229 - Friday Fix: 5 Signs You’re Giving Negative People Too Much Power Over Your Life

The Verywell Mind Podcast

Dotdash Media Inc.

Health & Fitness, Self-improvement, Mental Health, Education

5 • 703 Ratings

🗓️ 13 January 2023

⏱️ 8 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Have you ever spent two hours dreading the fact you were going to see someone for an hour? If so, you just gave that person two extra hours of your life. Have you ever blamed someone for ruining your day or putting you in a bad mood? If so, you gave that person power over your emotions. There are many ways in which we give negative people too much of our time, energy, and mental real estate. And the truth is, we all let negative people take a toll on us sometimes. And if we’re not careful, we might waste a lot of time and energy thinking about them or complaining about them. Or, we might let a negative person influence our behavior in an unhealthy way. When you realize that you’re doing it, however, you can create positive change. You can set limits on how much of an impact you’re going to let a negative person have over our thoughts, feelings, and behavior. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to the Very Well Mind podcast. We've interviewed over 100 authors, experts, entrepreneurs, athletes, musicians, and others to help you learn strategies to care for your mental health.
0:22.9	This episode is hosted by psychotherapist and bestselling author Amy Morin. Now let's get into the episode.
0:48.7	Okay. You're listening to the Friday fix. Every Friday, I share a quick mental strength strategy that can help fix the thoughts, feelings, and actions that can hold you back in life.
0:53.4	Today I'm talking about the
0:54.7	telltale signs that you're giving negative people too much power over your time, your thoughts,
1:00.7	and your energy. It's something that we've all done. Maybe you dislike a coworker and you spend
1:06.6	a lot of time thinking about how you dislike what they say in meetings or how you dislike how they
1:11.7	act around the office. Maybe you don't like someone in your extended family and you spend a lot of
1:17.2	time dreading every event that they're going to be at. The truth is negative people should take
1:22.5	up the least amount of space in our lives. But it's really easy to get that wrong and to allow negative people
1:28.7	to get the most of your attention. Of course, people often say things like, well, just cut toxic
1:35.4	people from your life. But just because you don't enjoy someone's behavior doesn't mean that that
1:40.2	person is toxic. And you can't always cut someone out of your life. If you want to keep your
1:45.5	job, you can't cut your boss out of your life. Or if you want to stay in a healthy relationship,
1:50.3	you might have to learn how to live with the fact that your partner's ex is still going to be in the
1:54.5	picture if they're co-parenting. It's important to recognize the warning signs that you're giving
1:59.7	someone too much power over your life. Here are five big warning signs that you're giving someone too much power over your life.
2:02.3	Here are five big warning signs that you're letting a negative person take up too much space.
2:08.0	Number one, you talk about them a lot.
2:11.4	So there's this idea that venting releases pent up anger and frustration.
2:16.0	But that's actually not true.
2:18.5	Instead, venting adds fuel to the fire.
	...

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