30 Attachment Styles (Dr. Joy Berkheimer)

How C*m

Remy Kassimir

Comedy, Sexuality, Health & Fitness, Sex, Funny, Learning, Education, Fun, Girltalk, Humor

4.8 • 2.3K Ratings

🗓️ 27 June 2023

⏱️ 52 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

What goes better with Pride than Joy? We end our Pride month with Dr. Joy Berkheimer, a licensed marriage and family therapist, to talk about all things love, sex, and relationships. We go deep into about attachment styles and how they affect our relationships, whether we're avoidant, fearful avoidant, anxious, disorganized, or secure. Dr. Joy explains how different types of households and upbringings can affect our attachment styles, and what we need to do to heal ourselves. We discuss therapy, what goes on in couples counseling and how it's not just about trying to keep couples together, but also about finding truth and clarity. Finally we learn some spicy stuff; Dr. Joy tells us about 'lust languages', erotic blueprints, and how to have good sex (spoiler alert: it involves sleep!).

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Hello everybody, welcome to how come this is our last episode for the month of pride and what
0:06.9	goes better with pride than joy. Today's guest is Dr. Joy Burkheimer, who is a licensed
0:14.2	marriage and family therapist, sexologist, dating coach, author and speaker. And we are talking
0:20.0	to her about attachment styles and then lust styles, the five erotic blueprints. Initially,
0:28.4	it was just going to be the erotic blueprints, but we got a question from a companion about
0:33.6	attachment styles and I've been wondering about them for a long time and I, who better to talk
0:40.0	about it with than a therapist. Trigger warning, if your parents don't have a perfect relationship,
0:46.6	yeah, trigger warning for that, trigger warning, if you don't have a secure attachment style,
0:51.4	which you know, whatever, like most of us don't, I certainly don't, we'll learn about what mine is,
0:57.3	or what we think mine is in this episode. And yeah, don't be mad at yourself or your parents,
1:08.0	if your attachment style is not perfect, this is not a death sentence, it's just a jumping off
1:14.3	point to start negotiations, as Cher said, in clueless. No, it's just an opportunity to like
1:20.2	reassess your stuff and figure out why things and relationships haven't been going exactly as smoothly
1:26.3	as you would like. And maybe it's a little reminder to go back into therapy. I was doing a podcast
1:32.0	the other day and just so you guys know, I've been so depressed lately, but somebody on the podcast
1:38.9	I was doing was like, podcasting is like therapy. And like, if it was, I feel a lot better. It is not
1:47.0	therapy, nothing's therapy except therapy. So we'll talk about that in this episode and I hope you guys
1:53.7	are all feeling mentally well. And if you're not, that's okay. I'm right here with you and I
2:00.4	just reached out to my therapist again and he's so proud of me. But more importantly, I'm proud of
2:05.7	me. And that is where the pride part of pride and joy comes in in this episode. No, I'm just kidding,
2:14.4	I mean, there are pride themes, but basically everybody can benefit from knowing what their
2:20.7	attachment style is, what their lust languages. It's not a straight or queer thing. So this episode
	...

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