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original podcast. I've got no idea and I've been sitting around here for ages, chopping vegetables for my tea.

I've got no idea what the hell you've been up to.

Have you had a busy day, darling?

I have had a slightly busy and emotional day,

reasons for which I will explain a little later in the podcast,

that is known in Radio Land as a tease.

Oh, you are a tease. And believe me, it's quite big news, ladies and gentlemen. Some of you,

I think, probably have guessed what it is. But for every... Some of them.

One, most of them. Two, nobody in the slightest bit surprised about the waterworks.

But anyway, we will, we, we are only teasing for now.

We don't want to bring this to a climax too early, do we, Ian?

No, we don't.

We would never want to do that.

So what's, what has been happening on the campaign trail today? Have you actually been able to pay any

attention to it? Well, I have, although I'm rather fascinated by events in the Vatican where the

Pope has been sailed for using the Italian word for faggotry. Basically saying the Catholic

church is riddled with the gayers

and he's got into a lot of trouble about it

because everyone thought that the Pope was quite sort of liberal on these issues

but he's profusely apologised and he thinks it got lost in translation

except that he is fluent in Italian isn't he as somebody was pointing out?

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