64: I'm a Grown Ass Woman Woman Without Any Friends... feat. Krista from Almost 30
Lovers and Friends with Shan Boodram
Lovers and Friends with Shan Boodram
5 • 5.5K Ratings
🗓️ 8 March 2023
⏱️ 61 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
According to the American Perspective Survey, May 2021, a lot of people are not satisfied with the size of their friendship group. About half of Americans (51 percent) report they are very satisfied or completely satisfied with the number of friends they have. 30 percent say they are only somewhat satisfied, and 17 percent say they are not too or not at all satisfied with the number of friends they have.
If you fall in that range of little to no satisfaction in friendships, here’s what you need to know about creating a bond.
So how long does it take to make a new friend?
-50 hours of time before you consider them a casual friend
- 90 hours before becoming real friends
- 200hours- before becoming close friends
- source: 'Journal of Social and Personal Relationships'
As the New York Times reported in 2012, there are “three conditions that sociologists since the 1950s have considered crucial to making close friends: proximity; repeated, unplanned interactions; and a setting that encourages people to let their guard down and confide in each other.” Cultivating emotionally intimate relationships, in other words, takes more work than just compliments.
In this episode I sit down with my friends Krista and Tabia and we talk about our friendships, the ups, downs and the work it takes to make them work.
A special thank you to Kamil Lewis, LMFT and Danielle Byard-Jacskon, Bumble Friendship Expert for lending their expertise on forming friendships.
Thanks to the sponsors of this episode.
ZocDoc:
https://www.zocdoc.com/
Ritual
https://ritual.com/lovers for 10% off your first 3 months
Follow the guests on this episode:
Follow Shan:
http://instagram.com/shanboody
http://tiktok.com/shanboody
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSE2Lr9RfYXiFtiX1jk5qng
[email protected]
Follow Krista:
https://www.instagram.com/itskrista/
https://www.instagram.com/almost30podcast/
https://www.instagram.com/morningmicrodose/
https://www.instagram.com/moderntarot/
Follow Tabia:
https://www.instagram.com/tabiacharles/
Follow Danielle Bayard-Jackson
https://www.instagram.com/daniellebayardjackson/
https://www.instagram.com/friendforward/
Follow Kamil Lewis, LMFT
https://www.instagram.com/kamil.lewis/?hl=en
https://www.instagram.com/theexpansivegroup/?hl=en
https://www.instagram.com/safewordpod/
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Day 2 of my exclusively adult virgin voyage |
| 0:06.0 | Oh, I've just discovered a remarkable new use for my phone. |
| 0:08.7 | Just by shaking it, I can get champagne delivered to me anywhere on board. |
| 0:12.2 | Imagine that! Tomorrow it's bubbly in the bubbles. |
| 0:15.2 | That's an optical term for champagne and hot tub. |
| 0:17.8 | Book an eligible cabin with virgin voyages by March 31st and get 50% off your second sailor |
| 0:23.2 | and hundreds of pounds worth of free drinks. |
| 0:25.3 | Ask your travel agent or visit virginvoidges.com |
| 0:28.5 | Now we're voyaging! |
| 0:30.2 | Hi, my name is Shamboodram. |
| 0:32.1 | I'm 37 years old and for the past 15 years, |
| 0:35.2 | I have been working as a public facing sex and relationship educator |
| 0:38.7 | whose mission is to help people become more competent |
| 0:41.7 | and thus more confident in their ability to build meaningful intimate connections. |
| 0:46.3 | And I am also someone who doesn't really have friends. |
| 0:50.8 | I'm 23 years old. I'm 25 years old. |
| 0:55.0 | I'm 25 years old. |
| 0:56.3 | I'm 26 years old. I'm 30 years old. |
| 0:59.1 | I'm 32 years old. I'm 37 years old. |
| 1:02.3 | I have a small black owned business. |
| 1:04.5 | I am in school for tantra. |
| 1:06.1 | I live nomatically. |
... |
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