86: The Pressure for Pleasure. Exploring the Dilemma of Both Being in the Mood feat. Elaine Welteroth and Jonathan Singletary

Lovers and Friends with Shan Boodram

Sexuality, Society & Culture, Relationships, Health & Fitness

5 • 5.5K Ratings

🗓️ 30 August 2023

⏱️ 67 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

What does it take to get you in the mood? Maybe like some it’s strawberries and silk. Or maybe like many others, it’s a little more … nuanced than that. Jonathan Singletary and my husband Jared Brady teamed up to make a sexy song devoted to the women who do a lot and consequently, need a little more to get…there. When it comes to being horny aka getting in the mood, this conversation is often about what you can do to get there, but in this episode we go into what has to first be done, OR in some cases undone for it to become feasible for all parties. Getting horny seems simple when we look at it through a Super Bad lens, but when we insert real people with real lives we can appreciate this complex process that relies on an interplay of neurological, hormonal, emotional, and physiological cooperation.

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Jonathan Singletary
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Elaine Welteroth
https://www.instagram.com/elainewelteroth
https://www.washingtonpost.com/advice/2023/02/14/ask-elaine-husband-new-mom-less-attracted/

Jared Brady
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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	What does it take to get you in the mood?
0:03.0	Maybe like some, it's strawberries and silk.
0:05.7	Or maybe, like others, it's a little more nuanced than that.
0:11.0	The way that I protected myself, like being a young person,
0:13.9	navigating New York was just being like,
0:15.7	I don't have sex.
0:17.2	And then you find somebody that actually deserves this part of you
0:20.7	that actually has earned this part of you
0:24.2	and it's still complicated for me.
0:27.0	And it's frustrating because it's like,
0:28.1	I feel like I did everything right.
0:30.0	Once we got married, I felt overwhelmed by the expectations.
0:35.0	It gave me anxiety.
0:35.9	Like I was just like, sort of disappointed
0:38.6	in that reaction from myself and didn't know what to do with it.
0:41.6	I actually felt like he deserved better than that.
0:45.0	Like I should be able to do this.
0:46.8	Why can't I do it?
0:47.6	So for me, getting in the mood is actually like,
0:51.5	it's a hard thing to do.
0:52.8	Jonathan Singletary, whose I noticed married
0:55.1	to Elaine Welteroth and my husband,
	...

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