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Joan Didian wrote that in her book The Year of Magical Thinking, and, was she right?

It's nothing we expect it to be, and it's different for everybody.

So wherever you are in your grief, I hope you find something in this podcast today that's

helpful.

In a few minutes I'll sit down with President Joe Biden in the White House for a conversation

about the losses in his life and how he lives with them. It is, I think, the first time any sitting US

president has agreed to do an entire interview solely focused on grief.

A couple days before the interview I was going through a box of stuff in my

basement that belonged to my brother Carter. He died by suicide in 1988. I don't have a lot of photos of Carter visible in my house. I still find

it too painful. In the box there were a bunch of pictures of him but two in particular stood

out. A Polaroid I'd seen before and a frame black and white

photo which was one of my mom's favorites. It was taken by a friend of his

Winky Lewis shortly before he graduated Princeton. He's smiling, and he looks so young and so handsome and so happy.

Fifteen months later, he killed himself in front of our mom.

He was 23. Sitting on the basement floor studying his

face in these pictures I found myself weeping. I wasn't sure why at first but

later it hit me.

...