Patrick Bateman, if he had been born in like 2004, could have been such a great, like, alpha male get rich quick TikToker.

Hello, hello, and welcome back to A BitFruity. I'm Matt Bernstein. I'm so happy that you're here. On March 22nd, just under a month ago,

I was scrolling on Twitter when I came across a video, when you came across a video,

when we all came across a video of an Instagram influencer I had never heard of before.

Even though he already had at this point 8 million followers now by the way up to 14 million

named ashton hall ashton is an extremely fit 29 year old man living apparently in an ultra-modern

barely furnished miami apartment the video which you know, was of his alleged morning routine,

which begins at a crisp 354 a.m. minute by minute, he chronicles his many morning tasks.

I mean, kind of, it's like unclear how, like why you need five hours to do exactly what he's

doing here, but not the point.

He does push-ups on the balcony of his apartment. He drinks many bottles of Saratoga water,

meditates for a few minutes, journals briefly, watches some church preacher Instagram reels,

inexplicably dunks his head in a bowl of ice water, handed to him by the hands of a woman

who is otherwise disembodied. She'd also later hand him food to which he says thank you

without looking up from his computer to acknowledge her. He eats a banana and then rubs the peel on

his face, some sort of biohacky skin care. He hops on a Zoom call. And in what is the only time in this morning

routine video that we hear his voice says, quote, so looking at it, bro, we got to go ahead and

get in at least 10,000. Unclear as to what we're talking about there. Ashton Hall's Instagram bio

touts, you can reinvent your life in one year.

And his website offers personal training programs that range in price from $3,300 to $8,250 a year.

When Ashton Hall's morning routine went viral, it was basically entirely because of people

dunking on him for how ridiculous it was. And Ashton

...