So do you have a child that's just kind of difficult to connect with at times.

Maybe it's a child who just does things in such a different way

and you don't always really understand them and that can be tough and I have to admit to my shame. I didn't like our son when he was little and that nearly destroyed my relationship with him because I struggled with how to connect with him and I know a lot of parents feel the same way, especially dads who

thought they'd be able to connect over sports, but then you have a child who

doesn't want to participate in team sports. But the hardest part for me was that Casey upended all my

preconceived notions of how kids are supposed to behave and how family life was supposed to go because he came out of

the womb with boxing gloves on, persistent and curious and wanting to do things his own way,

which was only a problem because I wanted him to do it my way,

not realizing my control issues were the real issue.

He was emotional and strong-willed and sensitive and obstinate and everything just seemed hard and I fought it and I tried to make him in my image and what Casey ultimately did was forced me to confront my own impatience, my inability to control my own emotions and my own behavior.

Look, it was embarrassing. I was a grown man. I was capable of being so

competent at work in sports, but I was kind of helpless when it came to being a father.

And I could like work, look for me working hard on professional projects at sports,

and climbing mountains. Sure that's tough. It can be exhausting mentally and physically, but I'm kind of naturally good at those

things. What Casey required of me, maybe what he forced me to wrestle with was much harder because it forced me to dig deep inside, to

wrestle emotionally with my own demons, to challenge my deepest held beliefs, to

learn how to relate in healthy ways to a child that was just challenging.

And in the end, it forced me to finally grow up.

Look, these kids are tough and it doesn't help that we're all flawed from our own

childhoods. We're basically kind of like big flawed kids trying to raise little flawed

kids and no one gives you an instruction manual for raising these

strong well kids look that's why you find our podcast because all the

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