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Judge John Hodgman

Barking and Entering

Judge John Hodgman

Jesse Thorn

World, Show, Complete, Hodgeman, Comedy, Pc, Daily, Hodgman, Mac, More, Expertise, Knowledge, Information

4.87.7K Ratings

🗓️ 19 February 2025

⏱️ 66 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

David leaves the door open when he lets out his husky. David's roommate, Logan, says the heat kicks on, and his room becomes a sauna! Logan believes his human comfort is more important than dog comfort! Who's right, who's wrong?

Transcript

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0:00.0

Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm Bill of Jesse Thorne. This week, Barking and

0:08.0

entering. David brings the case against his roommate, Logan. David and Logan own a home together. David

0:15.4

has a husky named Volta. When David lets Voltaire out into the yard, he leaves the door open so Volta

0:22.4

can let himself back in. Logan says when the door is left open, the heating system kicks in.

0:29.5

This makes Logan unbearably hot. Logan says human comfort is more important than dog comfort. Who's right, who's wrong, only one can

0:39.6

decide. Please rise as Judge John Hodgman enters the courtroom and presents an obscure cultural

0:45.6

reference. Reasons my Husky got mad at me this week, number one, he couldn't get down the

0:51.2

stairs at my boyfriend's place because they were too steep.

0:54.8

So my boyfriend had to carry him.

0:56.7

I will be taking full accountability for the angle of the stairs.

0:59.5

I should have been there when they were building the house 20 years before I was born to ensure that they installed an acceptable slope for my husky.

1:05.8

Reason number two, I stopped letting him inside, outside, outside, inside, inside, inside. After an hour at the end of the day, I am his employee, and if he wants to go inside,

1:15.0

outside, outside, outside.

1:16.0

For 24 hours a day, it's on me to open and close the door for him as much as he pleases.

1:20.4

And speaking of opening doors, number three, I didn't open the door all the way.

1:24.5

And even though he could 100% open it himself, why should he have to exert any extra energy when I'm clearly right there? So I really just need to stop being so

1:31.5

lazy and stop making my dog so angry. Bayel of Jesse Thorne, please swear the litigants in.

1:38.0

David, Logan, please rise and raise your right hands. Do you swear to tell the truth,

1:42.3

the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?

1:51.5

So help you, God, or whatever. I do. Do you swear to abide by Judge John Hodgman's ruling,

1:59.3

despite the fact that the real expert on Huskies is my eccentric Aunt Gail? Yes. She runs Norseled rescue in Oakland, California.

2:02.7

Judge Hodgman, you may proceed.

...

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