Care & Feeding | Should I Keep My Kid’s Secrets?

Slate Culture

Slate Podcasts

Arts, Tv & Film, Music

4.4 • 2K Ratings

🗓️ 13 March 2025

⏱️ 37 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

On this episode: Elizabeth, Lucy and Jamilah talk about secrets. A member of our Facebook community recently asked how you should handle it when a kid confides in you… and asks you not to tell your co-parent. Is her current no-secrets policy solid, or should she maybe reconsider? And after that discussion, we’ll of course circle up for a round of triumphs and fails. Join us on Facebook and email us at [email protected] to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318. If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get to hang out with us on the Plus Playground every week for a whole additional grab-bag of content — and you’ll get an ad-free experience across the network. And you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus – or try it out on Apple Podcasts. Podcast produced by Maura Currie. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey folks, it's Charles Duhigg, the former host of Slate's advice podcast, How To, and the author of The Power of Habit.
0:07.4	I'm teaming up with Slate again for a mini-series based on my latest book, Super Communicators, How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection.
0:15.1	It's a deep dive into how to have better conversations about the neuroscience behind how we connect with each other and why the
0:21.6	right questions can transform complete strangers into immediate friends.
0:25.6	The very first time I did this was at a conference.
0:29.6	These were all like C-suite executives.
0:32.6	That's the psychologist Nick Epley.
0:34.6	He paired all those execs up and then he told them that they had to
0:37.8	ask and answer a really personal question. When's the last time you cried in front of another
0:43.8	person? And you could sort of feel the whole room just groan. After 10 minutes, everybody was deep
0:51.2	in conversation. I finally get to 20 minutes. A couple of them are hugging each other.
0:56.3	It was kind of magical that moment, actually. Join me, Charles Duhigg, for super communicators,
1:02.3	wherever you get your podcasts. This episode may contain explicit language.
1:12.8	Welcome to Karen Feeding, the show where we raise the next generation together.
1:17.0	I'm Lucy Lopez. I host another podcast, The Mamacita Rica.
1:21.1	I'm Mother To Amelia, who's 14, Avery, who's 12, and we live in Miami, baby.
1:26.0	I'm Elizabeth New Camp. I write the family travel blog, Dutch Dutch Goose. I'm the mom to Henry who's 12, Oliver who's 12 and we live in Miami baby. I'm Elizabeth New Camp. I write the family travel blog, Dutch
1:28.7	Dutch goose. I'm the mom to Henry who's 12, Oliver who's 10, and Teddy who's 8. We live in
1:34.0	Tokyo, Japan. I'm Jamila Mew, a writer, contributor to Slate's Karen feeding parenting column,
1:41.1	and mom to Naima, who's basically basically 12 and we live in Los Angeles.
1:45.0	Today on the show we're talking about secrets. A member of our Facebook community
1:49.0	recently asked how she should handle it when a kid confines in you and asked you not to tell
	...

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