Ep 206: My Sister Sarah’s Legacy: Teaching Boys to Break the Cycle of Coercive Control & Male Violence with Bernie Bernard, Part 2

Crime Analyst

Laura Richards

True Crime

4.9 • 2.8K Ratings

🗓️ 27 August 2024

⏱️ 60 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Laura and Bernie continue to unravel how Sarah, Bernie’s sister, was love bombed and manipulated by Ian Hope from the first direct message he sent her, leading to a pattern of abuse. On one occasion Hope assaulted Sarah with a rolling pin, hospitalizing her for four days. The night Hope murdered Sarah, the police were called but they failed to check Hope’s history or take proactive action directed at him. In fact, they didn’t even ask his name. In this episode you’ll learn why victim blaming is pervasive and how everything in our language structure and systems is designed to edit the male abuser from the narrative. Bernie shares how he uses Sarah’s murder to educate young boys to change their behaviour early on asking questions including: What is sexual violence? What is consent? How many women have been killed by men who gave the reason it was a sex game gone wrong? How many men have been strangled to death by women in similar so-called sex games gone wrong? You will have many lightbulb moments. Listen, share the episode with people you care about and join the conversation in the Crime Analyst Squad: www.patreon.com/CrimeAnalyst #SarahGosling #HerNameWasSarahGosling #CrimeAnalyst #Expert #Analysis #TrueCrime #Podcast #CoerciveControl #SexualViolence #MaleViolence #IanHope Clips https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ElJxUVJ8blw Sources https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-tyne-20547728 https://innovativeenterprise.co.uk/portfolio/domestic-violence-sarahs-legacy/ https://manenough.com/podcast/ https://www.amazon.com/Love-Men-Vision-Mindful-Masculinity/dp/1250196248 https://innovativeenterprise.co.uk/2024/04/16/book-review-for-the-love-of-men-by-liz-plank/ https://cms.barnardos.org.uk/sites/default/files/2022-12/Online-safety%20bill-pornography-children-briefing-dec2022.pdf https://wecantconsenttothis.uk/ https://www.cps.gov.uk/publication/cps-and-equally-ours-research-public-understanding-rape-and-serious-sexual-offences https://www.jacksonkatz.com/ Thank you to the wonderful Crime Analyst Sponsor: Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at SHOPIFY.com/crimeanalyst REGISTER For Laura’s 2024 Masterclasses: https://shoutout.wix.com/so/b4P5SKknQ?languageTag=en More Training Info: www.dashriskchecklist.com www.thelaurarichards.com YouTube, Socials and Website YouTube @crimeanalyst Instagram @crimeanalyst @laurarichards999 Twitter @thecrimeanalyst @laurarichards99 TikTok @crimeanalystpod Website www.crime-analyst.com Leave a Review https://www.crime-analyst.com/reviews/new/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	I'm going to share with you a paradigm shifting perspective on the issues of gender violence,
0:04.8	sexual assault, domestic violence, relationship abuse, sexual harassment, sexual abuse of children,
0:09.9	that whole range of issues that I'll refer to in shorthand as gender violence issues.
0:14.1	They've been seen as women's issues that some good men help out with.
0:18.3	But I have a problem with that frame and I don't accept it.
0:20.7	I don't see these as women's issues that some good men help out with. In fact,
0:24.3	I'm going to argue that these are men's issues first and foremost.
0:27.6	Now obviously, obviously there are also women's issues so I appreciate that but calling
0:34.8	gender violence a women's issue is part of the problem for a number of reasons.
0:39.6	The first is that it gives men an excuse not to pay attention, right?
0:43.0	A lot of men hear the term women's issues and we tend to tune it out and we think,
0:47.0	hey, I'm a guy, that's for the girls, or that's for the women.
0:49.0	And a lot of men literally don't get beyond the first sentence as a result.
0:53.6	It's almost like a chip in our brain is activated,
0:55.8	and the neural pathways take our attention
0:57.8	in a different direction when we hear the term women's issues.
1:01.0	This is also true by the way of the word gender, and they think it means
1:06.1	women. So they think that gender issues is synonymous with women's issues. There's some confusion
1:11.3	about the term gender. And actually, let me illustrate that confusion by way of analogy.
1:15.0	So let's talk for a moment about race. In the US when we hear the word race a lot of people think that means African American Latino, Latino, Asian-American, Native American, South Asian,
1:25.6	Pacific Islander, on and on. A lot of people when they hear the word sexual orientation
1:30.0	think it means gay, lesbian, bisexual, and a lot of people when they hear the word gender think it means women.
	...

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