You are listening to the Life Coach School Podcast with Brook Castillo, episode 498.

Welcome to the Life Coach School Podcast, where it's all about real clients, real problems, and real coaching.

And now your host, Master Coach Instructor, Brook Castillo.

Hey, gorgeous friends.

Jump to. I am sitting on a bed in the Ritz Carlton in New York looking at Central Park.

And when I say looking at Central Park, I'm looking kind of over Central Park at all of the fall colors.

It is one of the most extraordinary views I have ever had in a hotel room.

It is gorgeous. I am kind of laid up here since I went and had a crazy laser treatment on my face.

They do this thing where they like basically burn off the top skin.

It's like this laser treatment and your skin on your face like scabs up and like turns brown and then falls off super attractive.

Not, but anyway, so I've been here just chilling out looking at the score just view doing some work at the Ritz Carlton New York in the fall.

It's crazy. We had like yesterday. It was like 80 degrees and today it's like overcast and like cold, but beautiful.

I have loved in New York this year. This is my third time here this year and I've just been loving it.

I like to come back and visit here when I can.

Let's talk about influence and let's talk about where you're being influenced and make sure you're doing it consciously.

I recently went and hung out with my friends Alex and Leila and Alex always blows my mind with I mean they both do actually but I'll expose my mind with these little one liners that he has and one of the things that he recently said that I was like what if you want to change your life.

Change the people you compare yourself to and my mind like literally like exploded because it really made me think about how much we use life comparison to

our emotional life and I watch clients do it all the time they compare their lives to some idealized version of their life that they think the life that they're supposed to be living and they cause themselves so much on happiness because of it.

So basically what they do is what many of us do right we have this idea of the good life right and it's typically some ridiculous version of you're born healthy and loved.

And your parents parent you properly and they're happy and they stay together and everyone stays healthy and no one is a hot mess and everyone treats each other properly and we do well in school and we don't do any drugs and we don't you know have any problems with any of our relationships

like it's ridiculous what we compare our lives to and so many times I have a client they're like it wasn't supposed to happen or this shouldn't have happened and I'm always like oh shouldn't it have according to who right like according to this version that we have of our life.

Well if everybody kind of has this idealized version that we've created in our mind where does that come from where does this idealized version come from and for so many of us it comes from it's like a composite of all these different expectations that we've been socialized to believe that are real and true and that's how life should be.

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