4.9 • 856 Ratings
🗓️ 13 July 2023
⏱️ 63 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
We're blown' our own backs out as we discuss going Full Metal Jacket at your job, diddlers getting stabbed in prison, and Diabetes Dad.
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0:21.1 | Welcome back to Dad Meet everybody. Tim, how are you? I'm great, Mike. How are you? I'm doing good, man. I'm feeling good. I am too. I got my nose of the grindstone. Yeah. Yeah. I'm in the fucking retard factory every day just trying to get this shit cranked out and I'm kind of feeling of you know me. I like the feeling of you know me. I like the feeling of applying myself to something. I know. So this is my crush it probably. This is a nice state for me to be in. |
0:23.3 | Do you have any Chinese employees killing themselves yet? |
0:29.6 | Not yet. We're going to install a suicide net around the second floor of the building so Danny can't jump out a window. |
0:34.6 | Aside from that, dude, all of our Chinese factory slaves are tip-top shape. |
0:38.5 | Would you have ever given any of the jobs you've had the satisfaction of killing yourself there? |
0:39.5 | Oh, wow, what a great question. |
0:41.1 | I mean, that's the great fantasies. |
0:43.9 | Like, the worst day you have at any job. |
0:46.8 | I probably had this at every job where you're just like, oh, yeah, oh, yeah, they think |
0:50.6 | they could just fucking force me to stay late tonight. |
0:52.4 | What if I fucking kill myself in the bathroom? |
0:54.6 | What if I made a real fucking mess in the bathroom and they had to clean it up? |
0:58.3 | And I bet they'd feel like real dickheads. |
1:00.2 | And like you'd plan out like a note. |
1:01.9 | Uh-huh. |
1:02.1 | You start like typing it up like, and another thing. |
1:05.5 | Everyone in HR can suck my dick. |
1:07.9 | I did it and like the reality is that like one janitor would be kind of |
1:12.8 | miffed about like having a refill a mopping bucket and everyone else would just be like |
1:17.2 | oh is he uh is anyone going to like grab that mouse he always had a nice mouse oh shit that's that's |
1:24.6 | a four button mouse dude it's especially designed for fucking carpal tunnel. |
1:29.5 | Yeah, yeah. |
... |
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