Welcome to Betrayal Trauma Recovery. This is Anne. It's early in the morning today. Everyone is

concerned for good reason about the coronavirus outbreak and also all the flights that are canceled

and the stock market and people being quarantined and employers

telling people to work from home, etc. I wanted to talk about how men who exhibit abusive

behaviors tend to escalate during a crisis, although they may put on the opposite.

They may like really, really good during a crisis.

So it could be any of those things.

But just to prepare you, especially if you're quarantined with a man who is exhibiting abusive behaviors.

A lot of women have trouble and abusive episodes happen when they're on vacation or on the weekend

or other times where they're with the abuser full time and he doesn't have an outlet to

either go act out or something to excuse himself

or get out of family duties. Generally speaking, abusers like to use anything they can to get out of

housework or things they don't want to do or to get away from a situation that they feel

uncomfortable with. Work is a really good excuse. So we hear a lot of abusive men saying things like

you don't respect my work, you don't respect me, my job is important, I need to be able to

work in peace. We know that that's an issue. So if you are about to be quarantined

with a man exhibiting abusive behaviors, just observe what happens. If they don't have an outlet

to be able to use their drug, right? Use porn, masturbate. They may create a fight so that they can get away

so that they can use their drug. That's not your fault. They want to blame it on you, but don't,

don't buy it. Don't buy it. You're going to notice things that you wouldn't notice before.

For example, I have a friend whose ex-husband remarried, and it was going

really well, and she was a little confused because she was like, wow, he was extremely abusive to me,

...