How to Vibe With Anyone [Social Intelligence Brief]

The Art of Charm

http://www.TheArtOfCharm.com

Business, Health & Fitness, Education

4.7 • 11K Ratings

🗓️ 24 April 2025

⏱️ 22 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Are you missing the skill that actually determines success? In this episode of Social Intelligence, AJ Harbinger and Johnny Dzubak reveal how to create genuine connections in high-stakes situations - whether it's a first date, business lunch, or million-dollar meeting. This masterclass in "vibing" breaks down the science of meaningful connection and shares practical strategies that helped one client secure a $100 million investment during a simple golf outing. AJ and Johnny explain why focusing on shared emotional states—not just similarities—is the secret to memorable connections. If you struggle with making strong impressions, maximizing limited time with important contacts, or turning brief interactions into meaningful relationships, this episode offers the framework you've been missing. What to Listen For [00:00:00] Why social intelligence trumps technical skill for long-term success [00:02:04] How to approach high-stakes social situations with confidence [00:05:27] How one client secured a $100M investment during a golf outing [00:07:41] Strategic seating arrangements that create instant rapport [00:09:36] Open-ended questions that make the other person feel valued [00:12:29] Why shared emotions matter more than shared interests [00:14:09] Breaking the "question train" to avoid overwhelming others [00:16:56] How to discuss your passions authentically (even "nerdy" ones) [00:18:31] When and how to share your mission to inspire others to help [00:20:44] How to practice vibing in low-stakes situations Episode Takeaways: Social intelligence explains 85% of executive success while technical skill only accounts for 15% Sitting side-by-side creates better connection than sitting across from someone Focus on shared emotional states rather than just finding similarities Use open-ended questions that reveal both facts AND feelings Break the "question train" with the question-answer-statement formula Share your journey, not just your current credentials or position Discuss your passions with genuine emotion to create memorable connections If someone seems reserved, be the first to open up and show vulnerability Practice these skills in low-stakes situations before applying them to important meetings A Word From Our Sponsors Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Quince Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns. Shopify Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm. Indeed Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm. Curious about your influence level? Get your Influence Index Score today! Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence. Resources from this Episode The Art of Charm Social Intelligence Program Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on LinkedIn Johnny on LinkedIn AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube The Art of Charm on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Are you missing the skill that actually determines success?
0:11.5	Most high performers don't realize they're missing what research now confirms is the number one predictor of career advancement, relationship satisfaction, and overall well-being,
0:23.3	social intelligence. In fact, a 22 Harvard Business Review study revealed that technical skill alone
0:29.3	only explains 15% of success at the executive level. The remaining 85%? Well, that's determined by
0:36.9	your ability to connect, influence, and build
0:39.6	meaningful relationships. Now, you might be missing this critical skill if people often misunderstand
0:45.8	or overlook your contributions despite their quality. You find yourself excluded from important
0:51.7	decisions or even worse, social events.
0:59.0	Your relationships feel consistently more difficult and frustrating than they should be.
1:03.8	You watch less qualified but more socially adept people advance ahead of you. Or you sense that there's this invisible barrier between you and the opportunities that you deserve.
1:10.3	Now here's the painful truth.
1:11.8	Most analytical professionals were never taught about social dynamics and how they actually
1:17.3	work.
1:18.5	Instead, you might have received vague platitudes like just be yourself or put yourself out
1:23.6	there more that completely ignore how your analytical mind actually processes information.
1:29.4	Now, if you're not seeing the results that you want professionally or socially, it's not because
1:33.8	you're inherently awkward or you're destined to be overlooked. It's just because you haven't had a
1:38.8	systematic framework for how communication and human connection actually work. So we're excited to drop another episode
1:46.9	weekly called Social Intelligence. We're going to share with you simple strategies that we use
1:52.7	in everyday situations to be more socially intelligent, to get ahead professionally, romantically,
1:59.6	and socially so that you're no longer feeling invisible or left out.
2:04.4	And Johnny, I know today's topic is actually one that we're really excited about because so often we find
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