Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman Podcast. I'm Bill of Jesse Thorne. This week,

Junk and this quarterly. Simon brings the case against his wife, Liz. Liz is an avid subscriber to the Journal

of the American Veterinary Medical Association.

She keeps a big stack of back issues

right next to the toilet.

Simon says, toss the magazines.

Liz doesn't care what Simon says.

She's gonna read them, eventually.

Who's right, who's wrong, only one can decide, please rise as Judge John

Hodgman enters the courtroom and presents an obscure cultural reference.

People ask me, aren't you proud of yourself? I tell them no, not in the slightest. I've done so much harm and made so many

charlatans quite rich. I opened a Pandora's box and I released to Frankenstein's monster.

Bail if Jesse Thorne please swear the litigants in.

Simon and Liz please rise and raise your right hands.

Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help you, God or whatever.

Yes.

I do.

Do you swear to abide by Judge John Hodgman's ruling, despite the fact that he has a competing interest having been the former

Food and Wine columnist for Men's Journal magazine, the Premier American magazine of Men's Journaling.

Yes.

Yes. Judge Hodgman, you may proceed. Do you like how I stole your old joke?

Simon and Liz, you may be seated. I love it. But I must clarify, I myself have a fondness for magazines. Indeed, I was a magazineer, having written

...