It's not easy being Jeff Lewis.

Used to be. When someone wronged me, I would go out of my way to retaliate and make them pay.

I've never had anyone killed or anything like that. Most chumps are dumb, and dumb chumps make stupid decisions.

Me included. We defend people without money every day.

Why? Here on this show.

Don't do that.

Jeff Lewis has issues. Hey, welcome to Jeff Lewis has issues.

Hey, welcome to Jeff Lewis has issues.

In today's episode, Lala Camp Mercedes-Juvita and I discuss what I found on my roof and

my new spray tan.

Later, Lala gives us the tea on the Vanderpump Rules reunion taping and her theories about

Tom Scandival.

Quickly, I have to address Mercedes spent the night at my house last week.

We didn't have as much fun as we should have because I was sick and I went to bed early,

but neither one of us got any sleep because throughout the night, it was a very windy night.

I have a flat roof on the house. The guest room's on the second floor. The primaries on the second floor. And you said, hey, if you want cats, then just don't close your door.

Or if you want to make sure you don't have cats, close the door.

Yes, because you'll have kitties on your bed.

Did you have kitties on your bed?

Yeah, but also you said, don't open your sliding glass door because you were afraid that I was going to not know that the cats could get out, out, out, out.

Right, right.

So we had a full-on conversation about that I understand that your cats are safe with me sleeping in the house tonight.

...