Protecting Yourself from Narcissistic People with Dr. Ramani Durvasula

Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

Being Well

Health & Fitness, Education, Self-improvement, Mental Health

4.8 • 2.4K Ratings

🗓️ 24 February 2025

⏱️ 80 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Dr. Ramani Durvasula, one of the world’s leading experts on narcissism and narcissistic abuse, joins Forrest to help us learn how to understand, identify, and recover from relationships with narcissistic people. They start by discussing the traits associated with narcissism, the spectrum of narcissistic behaviors, and Dr. Ramani’s critiques of the NPD diagnosis. They then talk about different kinds of narcissism and why narcissists can be difficult to identify before moving on to the issues with narcissism in relationships. Dr. Ramani explains the general pattern narcissism follows, what narcissistic abuse looks like in practice, and what we can do to become more "narcissist resistant.” About our Guest: Dr. Ramani is a clinical psychologist, professor emeritus at California State University, Los Angeles, and the author of a number of books including her most recent It’s Not You: Identifying and Healing from Narcissistic People. Her work has been featured on The Today Show, CNN, and The New York Times. She also offers an online program for survivors of narcissistic abuse. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:30: Defining the variety of narcissistic personality styles 9:40: Narcissism as a tactic for external validation 13:00: Narcissistic supplies, personality style, and diagnosable conditions 24:45: The appeal of narcissistic traits, and their effect on specific relationships 33:25: Getting stuck in a relationship with a narcissist, and devaluation 42:45: Manipulation, gaslighting, and discerning what’s real 52:35: Becoming narcissist resistant 1:00:45: Nervous system responses 1:03:25: Covert narcissism and seeing your own traits 1:06:45: Recap I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Field of Greens from Brickhouse Nutrition is a superfood powder packed with vitamins, minerals, fiber, and antioxidants. Use the code BEINGWELL at fieldofgreens.com for 20% off your first order. Head to acorns.com/beingwell or download the Acorns app to start saving and investing for your future Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Use promo code hanson at the link below to get an exclusive 60% off an annual plan at incogni.com/hanson. Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell. Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/ Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hello and welcome to being well. I'm Forrest Hanson.
0:10.1	If you're new to the show, thanks for listening today. And if you've listened before, welcome back.
0:14.3	I've been looking forward to this episode for a while. We scheduled it a while back.
0:17.9	And today I am joined by one of the world's leading experts on narcissism
0:21.9	and narcissistic abuse, Dr. Romney, Der Voscela. So, Dr. Romney, thanks for joining me today. How are you doing?
0:27.7	Thank you so much. I'm well for us. It's so nice to see. It's been a long time, so thank you again
0:32.1	for having me. Yeah, we did this years ago. I actually think before we were even on YouTube or anything like that,
0:37.8	it was a great conversation. I really enjoyed it. And since then, your work has totally exploded.
0:42.2	If you're interested in this topic, you're probably already familiar with Dr. Romney. She is a
0:46.1	clinical psychologist, a professor emeritus at Cal State University, Los Angeles,
0:50.6	and the author of a number of books, including her most recent, It's Not You, Identifying
0:55.9	and Healing from Narcissistic People.
0:58.4	Her work has been featured pretty much everywhere, The Today Show, CNN, The New York Times,
1:03.3	and she also has her own very, very popular YouTube channel.
1:06.2	I think that it's approaching 2 billion subscribers, which makes it just an enormous channel
1:10.2	in the space.
1:11.3	There are very, very few that cover mental health topics that get that big.
1:15.1	And so, yeah, so just really credit to you and the work you've been doing over the last little while.
1:19.1	Thank you. That's very kind. I always feel like it's a bit narcissistic to talk about what I've done.
1:24.6	So I think we just keep slowly pushing the boulder up the hill and hoping to hell it doesn't roll back on us.
1:30.2	Yeah, for sure.
1:30.5	Yeah.
	...

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