Relationships 2.0: Become a Better Negotiator

Hidden Brain

Hidden Brain Media

Arts, Science, Performing Arts, Social Sciences

4.6 • 40.4K Ratings

🗓️ 7 April 2025

⏱️ 53 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

When we head into a negotiation — whether we're asking for a raise or trying to get our spouse to do the dishes — our focus is usually on getting the other person to agree to our preferred outcome. What we don't focus on are our own biases and blind spots. Behavioral scientist Max Bazerman studies the theory and practice of negotiation, and he says that paying attention to these biases can help us to craft better deals.

Transcript

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0:00.0	This is Hidden Brain. I'm Shankar Vedantam.
0:04.0	More than five decades ago, an iconic scene in an iconic movie damaged the way millions of people thought about the art of negotiation.
0:16.2	In The Godfather, Marlon Brando, playing the role of Mafia boss Vito Corleone,
0:21.9	is approached by his godson, Johnny Fontaine.
0:25.3	The younger man wants a part in a movie, but a big-shot Hollywood executive refuses to give it to him.
0:33.3	The mafia leader assures his godson that he will get the role.
0:37.9	How? Vito Corleone says of the Hollywood exec.
0:41.3	I'm going to make him an offer he can't refuse.
0:46.4	By the standards of 1972, what follows is violent and gory.
0:52.8	Suffice it to say, the Mafia Don scares the Hollywood executive
0:56.0	into giving his godson the role.
1:02.0	For decades now, that memorable line,
1:05.0	I'll make him an offer he can't refuse,
1:07.0	has helped inform how millions of people think they can get their way in negotiations.
1:12.3	If you want a raise, or a business deal, or an agreement to end a war, you do it by arm
1:18.1	twisting. If you can make me hurt badly enough, I'll give you what you want.
1:27.2	Today on the show, we explore the science of negotiation.
1:31.2	What researchers have found about the art of crafting a good deal is more nuanced and more
1:36.3	uplifting than the lessons of mafia movies.
1:41.7	How to Become a Better Negotiator This week on Hidden Brain
1:47.0	When we head into a negotiation to buy a new car, to get a refund, to figure out how to divide household chores, our focus is usually on getting the other party to agree to our preferred outcome. We focus on all the ways the other side can be obstinate or intransigent.
2:20.3	What we don't focus on are our own biases and blind spots.
	...

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