Self-Concept: The Secret to Changing WHO You Are

Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

Being Well

Health & Fitness, Education, Self-improvement, Mental Health

4.8 • 2.4K Ratings

🗓️ 14 April 2025

⏱️ 68 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Forrest and Dr. Rick explore how self-concept, the invisible architecture of who we are, shapes our lives. They discuss how identity can become a cage, the unconscious beliefs we have about who we are, and how loosening those beliefs might be the key to lasting change. Forrest and Rick talk about the science of psychological flexibility, how to challenge limiting self-beliefs, and why a little more “don’t-know mind” can go a long way. They share insights from Carl Rogers, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), and Buddhist philosophy, and focus on practical ways to update your self-concept without losing who you are. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:40: What is self-concept? 8:25: Stories, frameworks, and expectations 13:30: ‘I’ vs. ‘me’, and feeling misunderstood 16:55: Carl Rogers’ framework of self-concept and congruence 24:20: Common tropes for defending identity 30:45: Applying principles of biological evolution to your sense of self 34:50: Resistance to change, and misguided beliefs 40:35: Don’t-know mind, affirmation, and taking in the good 47:30: The Buddhist conception of the self 53:40: Living in direct experience, and basic trust 56:50: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Get Headspace FREE for 60 days. Go to Headspace.com/BEINGWELL60 to unlock all of Headspace FREE for 60 days. Head to fastgrowingtrees.com/BEINGWELL to get 15% off the best deals for your yard. Use BEINGWELL at checkout, and take advantage of their Alive and Thrive Guarantee! Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell. Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/ Go to ZOE.com and find out what ZOE Membership could do for you. Use code WELL10 to get 10% off membership. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hello and welcome to being well. I'm Forrest Hanson. If you're new to the show,
0:10.9	thanks for joining us today. And if you've listened to before, welcome back. Most of the content
0:16.1	that we do on this show and most self-helpy in general, focuses on what to do, different strategies,
0:23.1	habits, and routines. And that is really important. We've talked a lot about the value of small,
0:28.7	consistent changes, and how applying something like the 90-10 principle can make a big difference
0:33.5	over time. But sometimes, even when we know exactly what to do, we still don't do it. Or we try,
0:40.4	but we keep running into the same problems and patterns over and over again. And when that happens,
0:46.9	it's often because of something deeper. A story we're telling ourselves about who we are. This is
0:53.0	where self-concept comes in. It's the invisible
0:55.7	framework we use to answer the question, who am I? It shapes how we see ourselves and what we
1:00.2	believe we're capable of, and when that framework is too rigid or outdated, it can become a
1:05.5	kind of invisible cage that keeps us stuck. We talk about self-concept a lot on the show,
1:10.7	but I don't think we've
1:11.6	done a focused episode on it, at least not for a long time. And I've been thinking about this
1:15.1	topic for a while, how changing your self-concept isn't just a lever for change. In some ways,
1:21.2	it's the lever for change. So today, I'm really excited to talk about it with my guest, as usual, clinical psychologist, Rick Hansen.
1:27.7	So, Dad, how are you doing?
1:29.0	I'm really good, and I'm very psyched about this topic.
1:32.9	I am too.
1:34.8	Yeah, in part because I'm into it, there's a chance that I'm just going to monologue a little bit here,
1:40.3	and I'm going to try to avoid that.
1:41.7	But I would love to actually start by talking a bit
	...

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