Ten Things TO DO In Your Faith Deconstruction | Ep. 2013
Mormon Stories Podcast
Dr. John Dehlin
4.6 • 5.2K Ratings
🗓️ 24 April 2025
⏱️ 87 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
In this powerful follow-up conversation, Britt Hartley returns to explore 10 practical and emotional steps to take during your faith deconstruction journey. From embracing anger and grief, to rediscovering your identity, setting boundaries, and finding peace in the unknown—this episode is a guide to healing, growth, and transformation.
Whether you're newly questioning or deep in the process, these insights will help you navigate deconstruction with compassion and clarity.
Topics include:
Grieving your old beliefs
Embracing uncertainty
Inner child & shadow work
Building authentic community
Setting loving boundaries
Learning to just be
Join us as we unpack the deep emotional layers of deconstruction and the tools that can truly support your journey.
___________________
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Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | This is going to be a good to do list for you to hopefully take away and say, not only are there things to avoid, but these are the things that tend to help people go through the deconstruction process. |
| 0:09.7 | A lot of these things I did the wrong way or wish I would have done better and it's part of my story and I just hoped that it helped someone on their deconstruction path. |
| 0:17.7 | I think I would have done better in my deconstruction if earlier on I would have been more okay with, I don't know. |
| 0:24.0 | Claim a chapter of grief and anger. |
| 0:26.4 | Anger is an emotion that tells us there's a boundary that's been violated. |
| 0:30.5 | And if you were raised in Mormonism, that has happened to you thousands of times. |
| 0:34.6 | Dark Knights of the Soul and Fowler's level of faith, midlife crisis, |
| 0:38.7 | it's a very common human thing to go through. It's so scary and disorienting. But when you feel |
| 0:45.0 | like, oh, a lot of people deconstruct whatever their reality from childhood was, and then they |
| 0:50.6 | move forward and you can actually get language for it and models for it and words for it. |
| 0:56.6 | It helps you feel like I'm not the only one who's thought this or gone through this or in this situation. |
| 1:02.9 | And then it can help you feel like, oh, that's happening to me and it's going to be okay. |
| 1:06.8 | And it can just give you a level of confidence in your deconstruction. |
| 1:10.2 | The easiest part of a Mormon deconstruction is going and doing the church history dive. |
| 1:15.5 | That's the easiest part. |
| 1:17.8 | The real work is how do you decoult your brain that has been wired for cults? |
| 1:23.1 | How do you do that? |
| 1:24.0 | How do you rebuild? |
| 1:24.7 | It's not a rejection of Mormonism to take up your handcart |
| 1:27.9 | and move forward. It's actually a great homage to our ancestry. If we take what was good and hold |
| 1:33.7 | on to one another's hands and point out the pitfalls along the way that we can avoid, I have hope |
| 1:38.5 | that what is ahead is better than what we are leaving behind, especially for our children. They need |
... |
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