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Dad Meat

The #1 Man In America pt. 1 w/ Tubs

Dad Meat

Tim Butterly/Mike Rainey

Leisure, Comedy

4.9856 Ratings

🗓️ 17 April 2024

⏱️ 56 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Join us at Patreon.com/dadmeatpodcast for part 2 of this episode. Pay whatever you want to become a Patron.

Check out Mr. Tubs Plumbing for all your plumbing needs

See Tim do stand up live: https://linktr.ee/timbutterly

See Mike do stand up live: https://linktr.ee/MikeRainey82

Check out Tim's YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@TimButterly for live streams and his killer new project, Field Trippin', which you can also support at Patreon.com/fieldtrippin

Buy Mike's book at OnPercs.com/store

Go to Patreon.com/lilstinkers for the best murder/Impractical Jokers-themed podcast out there

Get 20% off & free shipping with the code FATBIRD at Manscaped.com

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Welcome back to Dadmeet, bitch. Tim, Tubbs, Danny Dubs. Back at it again. We're back, baby.

0:06.2

In a devilish mood right now. Oh, no, man. Sorry for our live viewers, saw where we're so late,

0:10.9

we were having sex with Larry from the chat's mother. Who's also in a wheelchair?

0:15.2

I'm just playing. I'm just playing. We even never did. That's crazy. No, we did. We made her wheelchair crash into his, and now they're suing each other's insurance for damage.

0:22.4

Oh, my God.

0:23.4

Yeah, we, Iful towered Larry from the chat and his mother together, and we high-fived on the back of their heads and made them kiss.

0:28.6

They made them French kiss each other deeply.

0:30.4

Yeah, we made his mom put pegs on her wheelchair.

0:32.8

It's very... there's a lot of moving parts right now and a lot of actual parts so no i was stuck in i was stuck

0:39.5

behind an accident on 95 and bro you know you know the anticipation builds when you're just

0:48.2

sitting there nothing's moving and you go oh now i'm late for something and everyone's going to

0:51.9

think i'm a fucking dickhead and you and then you start getting you start licking your incisors and you go well at least I'm gonna get to see a pretty nasty wreck when I get up there and I got up there and dude it took an hour and to go to go no no distance and I finally get up there and there's one car might like maybe a door was kind of like

1:13.0

that like they'd clearly cleared up every other vehicle and all I got to see was the last one and

1:17.5

it was just the car kind of all right camry and a middle age white lady just like oh you know

1:24.8

just kind of annoyed about the whole thing. And I was just like, no!

1:31.9

I wanted to see fucking flip flops on the ground, dude.

1:33.0

I wanted to see... One spinning flip flops.

1:36.0

Bro, I wanted to see a blood-soaked fucking Saudi gown.

1:41.3

You know what I mean?

1:42.0

I wanted body parts and carnage. You wanted salt death,

1:45.2

man. That's what you wanted. And I didn't get any of it. And I, and that was right before the

1:52.8

exit to get here. So I just like kind of angrily got off the highway and parked my car and just

...

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