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like a professional. Post your free job on LinkedIn.com slash agree today. If you're the betrayed spouse

and you find yourself asking detective questions like, where were you when this happened? Or how many

times per week did you do it?

Or what positions did you see? Please, for the sake of your marriage, stop asking these questions.

Here's why. We're Adam and Krista King, and we've worked with thousands of couples over the last

decade struggling with broken trust in their marriage. We've seen couples get stuck in the detective mode for years and have watched their healing process grind to a halt.

Because here's the truth. You do need to ask the questions, but only healing questions.

And that's really where we get to the root of the problem.

Today we're going to walk you through the steps to have a productive conversation.

And this process is hard enough without doing more damage.

So again, we're talking to the betrayed spouse here.

We're not going to qualify everything we say.

This video assumes that your spouse is repentant and has stopped the affair or the pornography and is willing to open up about what happened.

So really the step one is we need to establish the edges of what happened.

And people always ask, what does that mean?

First, it doesn't mean becoming a detective and asking all sorts of questions

that you may not want the answers to. It simply means that you ask your spouse to put everything

on the table so that they're not doing what we call the dripper effect. And the dripper effect is

...