The following podcast is a dear media production.

If, on the other hand, you don't have a sensitive child who says, you know, I'm lazy

and you say, yeah, okay, I mean, with, I tell them, yeah, you are lazy, not get up and go study

because this non-sensitive child is not going to have, me saying that is not an emotional

peanut. To the emotionally sensitive child, me saying that is not an emotional peanut.

To the emotionally sensitive child, me saying you're lazy, if they say they're lazy,

is an emotional peanut and they're going to have a much bigger reaction.

Welcome to Raising Good Humans Podcast.

I'm Dr. Elisa Pressman, developmental psychologist and host. And I'm here today

with Dr. Blaise Aguirre, who is a psychiatrist and author and renowned leader in the field of child

psychiatry. His latest book, I hate myselfelf, Overcoming Self-Hatred and Realize

Why You're Wrong About You, is coming at a really important time. He's a professor of psychiatry

at Harvard Medical School, and he tackles really hard stuff. He's also the medical director at the McLean Hospital,

which is a very important place that serves families with the continuum of care using dialectical

behavioral therapy. He's just incredibly well regarded.

His contributions are immeasurable.

So I'm really thrilled to be able to bring this episode to you.

One of the things that struck me is how he talks about peanut allergies and the metaphor of for those highly sensitive, highly attuned kids and people saying something critical,

making just a quick comment can be like peanut for someone with a peanut allergy. Whereas a kid

who's kind of that dandelion that just sort of moves along, you can make those kind of

flippant comments too. You could tell them to stop being lazy and get going and all the things.

But when you say that to someone for whom there's the equivalent of a peanut allergy, it's going to

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