Welcome to Search Engine. I'm PJ Vote. No question too big, no question too small. It's the holidays here at Search Engine headquarters. In this season, like all seasons, the questions continue to roll in, providing our team, I would argue, the sharpest take on the national pulse of probably any news outlet, anywhere. We know the world because we know the questions that people in the world have.

And that's how we know that the most pressing concern, the thing Americans most wonder about currently,

has to do with our nation's airports. We got not one, but three listener questions, all on the same topic.

Hi, search engine. My name is Tiffany.

Hi, I'm John Morris.

And I'm Leah Siegel.

And I have a question I'm hoping you can help me answer.

What's the deal with airport shops?

Who the fuck buys luggage in airports?

Or are people buying luggage at the luggage store at the airport?

I just cannot buy that anyone goes to the airport,

probably waits and pays to check a suitcase,

clear security, and then decides to buy another suitcase

right before getting on their flight.

Do they have a handful of clothing?

Who needs a whole new bag in the airport

after we've gotten through security?

Perhaps it's like a babushka doll type thing

where you buy a bigger luggage and then put your luggage inside.

But I don't know.

Who buys luggage in an airport?

To spell out the paradox here,

...