Why We Hurt the Ones We Love—and How to Fix It

The Naked Marriage with Dave & Ashley Willis

XO Marriage

Society & Culture, Religion & Spirituality, Relationships

4.8 • 2.8K Ratings

🗓️ 21 October 2024

⏱️ 40 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Welcome back to the Naked Marriage Podcast with Dave & Ashley Willis! In this episode, we’re tackling one of the biggest relationship killers: contempt. We talk about how constant criticism and negativity can slowly erode the foundation of your marriage, creating resentment and emotional distance. But don’t worry—we’re also sharing some powerful ways to recognize and stop this cycle, with practical advice and faith-based tools to help you build a stronger, more loving connection. If you’ve ever felt like criticism is taking over, this episode is for you! ------------ Chapters 00:00 Understanding Contempt in Marriage 10:14 The Importance of Seeking Help 20:49 The Cycle of Negativity and Its Impact 30:03 Transforming Contempt into Connection 39:13 The Role of Faith in Healing Relationships Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hello and welcome back to the Naked Marriage Podcast we are Dave and Ashley
0:07.2	Willis and on this podcast we address the truth about sex, intimacy and
0:11.2	lifelong love and we are continuing to talk about more red flags in
0:15.9	your marriage. Dave is going to tell you what we're going to talk about today.
0:18.4	Yeah, this is a huge one and a sad one when a marriage falls into this dynamic and it's when there is a tone of
0:25.9	constant criticism or even contempt in the marriage.
0:30.8	I mean it's Dr. John Gottman, a very famous marriage researcher, author of seven
0:35.4	principles for making marriage work.
0:37.6	He's done research on marriage all of his career and says that contempt or constant criticism
0:41.9	is one of the clearest signs that a marriage is in crisis
0:46.6	and headed for divorce unless it's quickly turned around.
0:51.4	But it is maybe the biggest red flag because once you get to
0:54.7	that point where it's like your spouse can't do anything right, you know, you're just
0:59.3	rolling your eyes at them all the time or they're doing that at you. There's not any warmth in the
1:04.4	tone, there's no encouragement or even courtesy, it's just negative and it's harsh and
1:10.1	it's hard. And we've all been around couples like this.
1:13.0	Oh, yeah.
1:14.0	And it's so uncomfortable.
1:16.0	Oh, it is.
1:17.0	It's so cringy.
1:18.0	You know, you hate it for them.
1:20.0	Yeah.
	...

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