What do you need? What are some of the skills you need in a relationship?

One is you need to be able to challenge your partner.

Even if they're innocent, you need to be able to say it. My feelings really were hurt when you canceled our bike ride on Saturday to be with your friends.

If your partner flips out and can't even hear that kind of a complaint, how do you deal with the big issues?

Welcome to the Art of Charm. I'm your host, Jordan Harbinger. Today, we're talking with our old friend Linda Carroll.

We're going to talk about narcissists and relationships and the current trend of labeling people, you know, our lovers, partners, mothers, etc.

as having character disorders. It's almost a buzzword now, especially narcissism.

We'll talk about why that's damaging the narcissistic continuum that we are all a part of.

What constitutes a true personality disorder person? And of course, what we can do about this if we think we or someone we know and love might be in a relationship

with a narcissist or even be one themselves. We're glad to have you with us here today at AOC.

We'll see so enjoy this episode with Linda Carroll. And by the way, if you're new to the show, we'd love to send you some top episodes and the AOC toolbox.

That's where we discuss concepts like reading body language, having charismatic nonverbal communication, the science of attraction, negotiation techniques, networking and influence strategies, mentorship, persuasion tactics,

and everything else that we teach here at the Art of Charm. In the US, you context the word charmed to 3 3 4 4 4. That's CHAR MED 2 3 3 4 4 4.

Everywhere else, just go to the art of charm dot com also at the art of charm dot com slash podcast. That's where you can find full show notes for this and all previous episodes of the show. All right. Here's Linda Carroll.

Linda, I'm really glad to have you back here on the show. Jason, I both are because every time we have you on the show, we learn a bunch of really interesting stuff that we had maybe thought about briefly, but never really done a deep dive on.

And every time we have you on, we get a lot of notes about how this was so interesting and we got to get a have her back and ask about this and we get a lot of family about it. So we're really interested in having you come back on it, especially when you suggested the following topic, which was the whole narcissism thing.

It seems like a buzz word and every time somebody breaks up with somebody now in this day and age, it's oh, well, they were just a total narcissist and it's like this clinical term that's getting abused. What do you think about that?

Well, did I send you the article I wrote for body, mind green. It's called is your ex really a narcissist and where it came from was that I started hearing people talking about people in their life who were difficult and they were calling them not just narcissists borderline personality. My mother's a borderline.

My ex girlfriends, a social pass, my boyfriend's a narcissist and I got curious about this because it seemed like it was happening all the time. People were using these labels all the time to describe it and I know that from my own clinical studies that maybe 1% of the population are real life narcissists.

So what is this phenomena? And I started to then read it because I write blogs. I read a lot of blogs and I couldn't believe how many blogs I read, many by people who were not trained or had not studied psychology about well, if your boyfriend does this or your girlfriend says this, she's a narcissist, dumper. I thought it's so incorrect. So I wrote this article and I just began to speak about it.

I think it's a fascinating topic and I want to try to set the record straight to so I love talking about it.

Yeah, it is abused and everybody becomes suddenly as persons and narcissists and what percentage of the population is a real narcissist single digits or point fraction of a percent, 1%.

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