Emotional Infidelity

Conversations with Dr. Jennifer

Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife

Self-improvement, Education, Mental Health, Sexuality, Health & Fitness

4.4 • 978 Ratings

🗓️ 14 May 2024

⏱️ 56 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Finlayson-Fife uses questions from her Facebook Group members to drive an important discussion about emotional infidelity. During the conversation, Dr. Finlayson-Fife explains why emotional affairs are so compelling, the impact they have on relationships, and how those who have experienced emotional infidelity can navigate forward wisely. Listen to the full episode to learn more about: * Intimacy Avoidance * Self-Deception * Intimacy vs Closeness * Important considerations post-disclosure * Trust vs Trustworthiness If you are interested in learning more about this topic, consider enrolling in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's newest mini-course Understanding Intimate Deception.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to Conversations with Dr. Jennifer, a collection of interviews on the topics of relationships, sexuality, and more, all featuring Dr Finlason Fife.
0:25.0	Welcome, everybody. glad to have you here.
0:27.0	We're going to be talking about emotional affairs today, how to understand infidelity, why people do it, why people
0:36.8	create emotional affairs, why it's so easy for us as human beings to do this. And we'll be taking some of the questions I'll be going through some of the
0:45.9	questions that came in through the Facebook group she writes well I don't know if
0:51.2	she a baby a he I'm just wondering everyone's thoughts on spouses having relationships or
0:57.8	friendships with the opposite sex. How much is too much? Where do you draw the line? How can you keep things from turning into an emotional affair or a sexual affair?
1:09.0	How open and honest do you feel your spouse or you need to be with each other if you have close friends
1:14.7	that are the opposite sex? Is it possible to not cross lines while having close friendships
1:20.8	with the opposite sex? So first of all I would say that about you
1:24.6	know 80% of emotional affairs start out as friendships and this is according to
1:38.0	Shirley Glass's book called Not Just Friends. And so the primary, one of the ways that Shirley Glass talks about what happens in emotional affairs is that a boundary that has normally been around the couple around the partnership gets drawn around the partner, one of the partners and the affair
1:58.8	partner.
2:00.2	And so there starts to be a way in which the spouse is being excluded from that friendship.
2:07.6	That is, there are secrets.
2:10.2	That is the primary definer, right, of infidelity is that you are keeping information from your spouse that you know she or he would want to have.
2:24.0	What starts to happen is you are keeping your spouse
2:26.8	from information you know they would want to have.
2:29.8	And so as soon as, you know, infidelity is not defined by the sexuality of the relationship per se
2:37.2	Right it's not about someone who's taking off their clothing that defines now it's infidelity. It's as soon as you are
2:44.6	excluding your partner and creating a boundary with another person. And
2:48.5	importantly you are sharing information that builds connection with another person and reduces
	...

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