According to reporting by Chris Rufo and Hannah Grossman at City Journal,

employees of the National Security Agency and other intelligence agencies

have been gathering on a work-related chat room to discuss their transgender surgeries and kinky sex preferences.

I don't know about you, but I'm thinking, wow, that's a relief.

Here, I was worried about the growing threat from China,

an imperialist, genocidal slave state that's not only outstripping our military in preparation to

destroy us at war, but has already infiltrated our society through Congress, universities,

corporations, Hollywood, and the news media in order to influence our politics, steal our technology,

and silence critics of

their evil regime. But why worry? The brave men and women of our intelligence community have

been on the job, along with the brave men in our intelligence community who think they're brave

women, and the brave women who identify as brave men, and the brave non-binaries who identify as brave

lesbians so they can have sex with other brave lesbians because essentially they're really

just brave men who happen to want to wear glittery mascara for some reason.

But anyway, the point is, all these brave mentally ill perverts of the intelligence community

are hard at work responding to the insidious Chinese penetration

of our society by going on a chat site to discuss how to turn their penises into fake vaginas

so they can enjoy some insidious penetration as well.

So sure, it is true that the Chinese Navy is growing by leaps and bounds while our Navy

dwindles to nothing and that one Chinese

shipyard can produce more vessels than all American shipyards combined.

But at least we can feel confident that somewhere an NSA employee is online chatting about

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