Some people feel that the news media reacted to Trump's tariff strategy like an hysterical woman

who imagines she saw a mouse in her bedroom and leaps up onto a chair shrieking insanely

until her husband rushes out of the bathroom where he's been locked away with his iPad for the last two hours

and tells her to calm the hell down, which only makes her more obsessed, so she starts babbling incoherently

that it's not about the mouse, it's about the fact that she feels neglected, whereupon

her husband breaks down and admits he's been struggling with a porn addiction, which makes

her start sobbing uncontrollably because now she feels unattractive on top of everything else,

and the husband says, well, excuse me, but I have to go back to struggling with my porn addiction and locks himself in the bathroom again so that the woman totally flies off the

handle, sets the house on fire, and runs into the street screaming about Trump's tariff strategy.

Until a doctor arrives and gives her a bunch of sedatives, proving that men never take women

seriously because they sound just like the news media.

Other people feel the news media reacted to Trump's strategy more like a man who was locked in the bathroom with his

pants around his ankles and suddenly realizes his house is on fire. Now, personally, I worry that this

open distrust of American journalism may cause many people to have negative feelings about the most corrupt

and destructive industry in the country. So let's take a look at some of these tariff news

reports and you can judge for yourself, or just let me judge for you, which will probably

work out better for everyone. In one example, the New York Times, a former newspaper, greeted the tariffs with a headline in 147-point type reading, quote,

Re, re-re-re, look out, Trump is creeping up behind you. He may already be inside the house, run for your life, re-re-re-re-unquote.

Conversely, the Wall Street Journal, which was a newspaper until much more recently,

greeted the turmoil in the stock market with a thoughtful op-ed by Milburn Pennybags,

the CEO of the famous investment firm, Sacks of Goldman. Mr. Pennybags wrote, quote,

I don't want to hear about some imaginary division between Wall Street and Main Street. We're all together

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