Episode 202: Reviewing Planned Emancipation Part 1 - The Freedoms List

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

Kenneth Wilgus, PhD, P.C.

Christian Parenting, Christianity, Teens, Education, Teenagers, Kids, Kids & Family, Parenting, Religion & Spirituality, Adolescents, How To, Parenting Teens, Parents

4.9 • 714 Ratings

🗓️ 18 February 2025

⏱️ 30 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Many of the questions that listeners send us ask for more details on the "Freedoms List" and the "Expectations and Consequences" list. How are they different? Can't we just put both of these on one, big list? Today we take on part one of these questions and clarify what the freedoms list is for and why it's different from the expectations and consequences list (which we'll talk about next week). We answer many other questions like, should you present these 2 lists at the same time? Are there other ways to grant freedoms other than putting them on a list? We discuss these and other questions on this first of a two part discussion. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome back to Feeding the Mouth That Bites You, a weekly podcast guide on parenting teens and launching them into the world.
0:15.2	I'm Jessica Pfeiffer, and as always, I'm joined by psychologist and author, Dr. Ken Wilgus.
0:21.3	Hey, Dr. Ken. Jessica. Hey, Dr. Ken.
0:22.8	Jessica. Good morning.
0:24.6	Yeah, it's good to see you.
0:26.7	I know that we have received some great emails recently.
0:32.0	And I want to clarify some of the things that parents are asking about.
0:35.6	And so I'm hoping that this episode, we could talk about the freedoms list
0:39.6	that you have referred to in your book.
0:42.4	Yeah, you know, it's funny because I was looking over our very first ones.
0:45.4	And, you know, we talked obviously about kind of what planned emancipation is about.
0:50.7	But it is a common email that we get about, wait a minute, what is the difference then
0:56.9	between a freedoms list and this expectations and consequences list? Because that's really the
1:04.1	basis of kind of how you roll this out is these two lists. But it does, well, no longer surprises me, but it's common that parents don't know
1:14.7	the difference or they actually try to combine them in kind of three column list and that includes
1:22.1	scripture and purpose statements of what we're trying to do that, you know, just kind of gets to be kind of a mess.
1:30.2	So, yeah, I think it's important to talk about what is the difference.
1:36.3	Well, I know as a parent, too, well, let me start back with this.
1:39.4	I remember as a kid, my dad gave me this really long.
1:46.7	It was actually a contract that I had to sign when I got my car. And part of it was like that I knew how to change a tire on the side of the
1:53.9	road. I had to accomplish certain tasks. I've heard this story in your family. And then I had to sign,
1:59.3	you know, I wasn't going to take my friends anywhere
	...

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