Hello, hello, everybody. Welcome back to another episode of Fluently Fixed, where we fix your life and the five people closest to you also get a residual fixback as well. That's what happens and one of these questions are answered. We've got five questions to dive into today. And the first one is for anyone out there who is anxiously attached. Oh, me. Me, whoever wrote this in and maybe

somebody else. Here is the question. Hi, Shannon. Shout out to you, by the way. You're a Patreon

subscriber, I see. She says, my situation is being anxiously attached. I have a wonderful boyfriend

of six months who provides as much security through his actions as someone could.

He's proactive, thoughtful, always planning things in the future.

But my brain still has these thoughts that he wants to break up with me when we're apart.

I think texting is a trigger for me.

He's busier than usual in this current stage of life, so we don't text all day when we don't see each other, but we do see each other often.

How do I get out of this anxious attachment headspace so I don't act on these thoughts? Thank you.

Anxious attachment. I am anxiously attached. I don't know if you've read the book Attached. My therapist recommended it to me. It was good, but honestly with that book, I feel like you could probably, you know,

read an audible on it or a podcast about it. Anxious attachment is a fucking killer, okay? Just being

anxious in general. Like, it doesn't make you feel good. And unlike some other things that you can

feel that aren't good, like fear or sadness. There's something about anxiety that gives you

a little bit of reward when you like ruminate on it. And then you can get stuck in this pattern where

you're just fixating on the same thing over and over and over again. And you think that the way to

get out of it is by fixating on it even more. So being anxiously attached, it fucking sucks. There's two things

that I try to do to help with this. Number one, and I'm saying this first because I think it's the

most important, book yourself. Make yourself busy and make yourself busy in specific ways,

because the phone really is a killer. I know that you

said texting is a trigger for you. I just think the phone in general, if you're anxious,

it's right there. You're going to think it's solving things. It really is not. It's one step forward,

three steps back. So I've sworn by doing this method in other episodes before, but when you have a night free, schedule it and make sure your phone is not involved. Okay, print out a recipe or open up a cookbook and be like, okay, from 6 to 7 p.m. tonight, I'm going to cook and listen to music on speakers, not in my AirPods, not connected to my phone, and really drill down, be like, I'm going to cook and listen to music on speakers, not in my AirPods, not connected to my phone,

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