I started ministry 18 years ago, and I remember early on I would not ask people to make a decision to follow Jesus while I was teaching

In the middle of the service, and I don't remember ever consciously like making that decision or having some hard stance against it

I remember later reflecting on those early years and thinking like how come I'm not

How come I'm not asking or inviting people to make a decision of all Jesus?

And I think it was because I had grown up in a church culture and a Christian culture where there was some sometimes it could feel like

emotionally manipulative where people would like kind of get you all riled up and you'd be in a room and everyone else is doing it

And so I guess I'll just raise my hand and repeat this prayer

That's a pastor the leader is asking me to pray and I didn't want to do that

I didn't want people just as like

Raise their hand so that we could count numbers and then they would go on with the rest of their life

And they didn't actually ever grow into discipleship

They never learned what it means to really follow Jesus. They never counted the cost of following Jesus

They just kind of repeated a prayer in an emotional service and went on with their life

And I didn't want them to think that's what following Jesus look like because we see in the scriptures that following Jesus is this

Crazy deep hard call to give up your life to die yourself to serve

A God and to say I'm not God and I'm going to give up all the things that I want to do in my own life

And instead follow the ways of King Jesus

Anyway, I say all that to tell you that recently I've just been feeling convicted

Mainly because I've been hearing more and more and more stories of guys who said listen

I just came to church some guy was teaching he presented the gospel

I felt like I was using that to tug my heart and I made a decision that day to follow Jesus

And ever since then I've been growing in my discipleship journey with him

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