Dad Tired

Porn. Shame. Repeat. Breaking the cycle starts with telling the truth.Jerrad Lopes returns after months of silence, not with answers—but with honesty. In this deeply vulnerable episode, Jerrad shares why he hasn’t told a single lie in 156 days, how intensive counseling broke him open, and what it means to be a “truth teller” in a world of escape. Whether it’s porn, alcohol, work, or Oreos—this is an invitation to stop numbing and start healing. If you're tired of hiding, if you're tired of performing, and you're ready to be fully present—this episode is for you. In this episode:​Why Jerrad hasn't lied in over 150 days (and why it matters)​The moment he broke down in counseling—and what it revealed​How performance becomes a survival tactic for so many men​Why honesty feels terrifying but is essential for freedom​Escapism, addiction, and the real reason we keep going back​What meditation taught him (and why he fell asleep once 😂)​The danger of "socially acceptable" numbing habits (Oreos, Zillow, work)​How to catch yourself in the act of escaping—and sit with your feelings instead Key Challenge for Listeners:Ask yourself:🧠 What are you trying to escape from?🔍 What are you using to escape? You don’t need to be perfect. But you do need to be honest. Start here. Resources & Mentions:​Dad Tired Community: dadtired.com​Support the show or sponsor inquiries: DadTired.com/donate​Today’s sponsor: BackGatePrayers.com promo code DADTIRED

Transcribed - Published: 21 April 2025

Most Christian men wouldn’t call it an addiction. “It’s just something I struggle with…” But what if that struggle is actually keeping you stuck?In this episode, Nick Stumbo—Executive Director of Pure Desire Ministries—shares his powerful story of addiction, shame, and the deeper healing Jesus offers.We talk about:Why confession isn’t the finish lineThe 3 questions that revealed Nick’s addictionWhat white-knuckling recovery really looks likeHow trauma, performance, and shame feed the cycleThis isn’t just about porn. It’s about what your soul is really craving.Learn more about Pure Desire Ministries: https://www.puredesire.orgGet Nick’s book Setting Us Free: https://amzn.to/3EtfY2PStart your healing journey with Dad Tired: [https://www.dadtired.com]Subscribe to the Dad Tired podcast for more episodes that help men lead their families well A special thanks to today's sponsor: www.dwellbible.com/dadtired

Transcribed - Published: 14 April 2025

After a four-month break from the podcast, Jerrad Lopes returns with his most vulnerable episode yet. In this raw and powerful conversation, he shares the painful truth behind his absence, including the sin that nearly cost him everything—and the healing journey that saved his life. Faced with two options—end it all or embrace the pain and pursue healing—Jerrad chose life. Now, he's back with a renewed vision for Dad Tired: to help men find the kind of deep healing that transforms everything. If you're tired, hurting, or hiding, this is the episode you didn’t know you needed. Sponsor: worldwatch.news/dadtired

Transcribed - Published: 7 April 2025

After a four-month break from the podcast, Jerrad Lopes returns with his most vulnerable episode yet. In this raw and powerful conversation, he shares the painful truth behind his absence, including the sin that nearly cost him everything—and the healing journey that saved his life. Faced with two options—end it all or embrace the pain and pursue healing—Jerrad chose life. Now, he's back with a renewed vision for Dad Tired: to help men find the kind of deep healing that transforms everything. If you're tired, hurting, or hiding, this is the episode you didn’t know you needed. Sponsor: worldwatch.news/dadtired

Transcribed - Published: 7 April 2025

In today's episode, Pastor Kaleb and Pastor Chris sit down with Jerrad to talk about the next season of Dad Tired.

Transcribed - Published: 31 March 2025

In this powerful follow-up to the series on biblical masculinity, Chris Hilkin continues unpacking what it means to be a man after God's own heart through the PRIME MEN acrostic. After Jerrad Lopes opens with a heartfelt update and thanks the Dad Tired community for their support, Chris teaches through the next key biblical traits of godly manhood: Intentional, Meek, Enduring, Moral, Empathetic, and Noble. With deep theological insight, biblical references, and real-life application, this episode challenges men to take spiritual leadership seriously—at home, in the church, and in the world.Bible Passages Mentioned:John 8 – Jesus and the woman caught in adultery1 Timothy 3:4-5 – Managing one's family wellEphesians 6:4 – Fathers training and instructing childrenGenesis 18:19 – Directing one’s household in the way of the LordGenesis 3:6 – Adam’s passivity in the Garden1 Samuel 3:11 – Eli’s failure to discipline his sonsMark 5 – Jesus healing the bleeding woman2 Timothy 1:7 – Spirit of power, love, and self-controlProverbs 16:32 – Better to be patient than a warriorPhilippians 2 – Christ’s humilityProverbs 24:16 – The righteous fall seven times but rise again1 Corinthians 16:13-14 – Be strong, courageous, and do everything in loveLuke 23 – Jesus carrying the cross1 Timothy 4:8 – Godliness has value for all thingsTitus 2:7-8 – Teaching with integrity1 Samuel 15 – Saul's disobedienceMatthew 4 – Jesus’ temptationJohn 17 – Jesus interceding for his disciplesNehemiah 4:14 – Fight for your familiesPhilippians 4:8 – Whatever is noble, think about such thingsProverbs 22:1 – A good name is more desirable than richesMicah 6:8 – Do justice, love mercy, walk humblyActs 5 – Ananias and SapphiraJoshua 7 – The sin of AchanJohn 18 – Jesus on trial before PilateIsaiah 53:7 – Like a lamb silent before its shearersLuke 23:34 – Jesus forgives those who crucified Him Discussion Questions:Which of the PRIME MEN traits (Peacemaking, Repentant, Intentional, Meek, Enduring, Moral, Empathetic, Noble) do you most naturally embody, and which one do you struggle with the most? Why? (Bonus: Print the list and literally highlight where you're strong and where you're bleeding, as suggested in the episode.)Read Ephesians 6:4. What does it look like for you, specifically, to take spiritual responsibility for your kids? In what ways have you been tempted to hand that role off to someone else?How have you misunderstood meekness in the past? What would it look like for you to walk in “power under control” this week?How does your private life reflect your integrity? Are there places in your life where you are “fractioned” or living in two different personas? What does integration look like for you?In a culture that values comfort and ease, what does it mean to endure like Jesus? How can you practically grow in endurance and perseverance when life gets hard?

Transcribed - Published: 24 March 2025

In this conversation, Chris Hilken explores the concept of masculinity, particularly focusing on its representation in media and the attributes of biblical masculinity. He discusses the importance of understanding true masculinity, the role of peacemaking, and the necessity of repentance in a man's life. Through personal anecdotes and biblical references, Hilken encourages men to reflect on their character and strive for growth in their understanding of masculinity.

Transcribed - Published: 17 March 2025

Show Notes: Biblical Masculinity Part 1 In this first part of the Biblical Masculinity series, Chris Hilken walks through what it truly means to be a man after God’s own heart. He shares personal stories—from growing up watching WWF to mentoring young men at youth camp—and challenges cultural stereotypes of masculinity. Instead of aggressive or passive extremes, he calls men to embody Christlike traits. Chris begins walking through an acronym, PRIMEMEN, and unpacks the first two attributes: Peacemaker and Repentant. What You’ll Learn:Why culture has distorted our view of masculinityWhy “The Rock” and pop-culture heroes fall short of biblical manhoodHow peacemaking and repentance are signs of real strengthThe difference between feeling sorry and true repentanceWhy Jesus is the perfect picture of masculinity Bible Verses Mentioned:Matthew 5:9 – “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called children of God.”Romans 5 – Jesus made peace with us through the cross.Romans 12:18 – “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”James 1:19 – “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.”Genesis 4:8 – Cain kills Abel out of rage.1 Samuel 18:6–9 – Saul’s jealousy drives him to attack David.John 8 – Jesus diffuses the angry mob with wisdom and justice.Luke 8 – Jesus calms the storm.Acts 3:19 – “Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out.”2 Corinthians 7 – Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation.Proverbs 28:13 – “Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy.”Luke 15 – The Prodigal SonLuke 19 – Zacchaeus repents and makes restitution.Hebrews 4 – God’s Word is a double-edged sword. Garage Group Discussion Questions:What images or messages about masculinity did you grow up with? How have they shaped you—for better or worse?Chris says, “Real men create no drama and control their anger.” What does that look like in your home or workplace right now?Read Matthew 5:9 and Romans 12:18. How can you actively pursue peace in a relationship where there’s tension?Repentance is more than saying sorry—it's turning and changing. What’s one area of your life where you're apologizing but not truly repenting?Chris shares how Jesus is “the better Cain, the better Saul.” In what ways can you look to Jesus—not culture—as your model of manhood this week?

Transcribed - Published: 17 March 2025

Jesus sent His disciples two by two—not alone. Why? Because ministry, life, and discipleship are not meant to be solo endeavors. In this episode, we unpack Luke 10:1 and explore the biblical foundation for companionship in the Christian life. From accountability and encouragement to strengthening our testimony, we’ll discuss why godly friendships matter for every man—whether you’re a pastor, a truck driver, or a dad just trying to raise your kids well. God’s design for brotherhood isn’t just about survival; it’s about finishing well.

Transcribed - Published: 10 March 2025

Make sure to connect with dwell at: dwellbible.com/dadtired On this episode of Dad Tired, we explore the road to Emmaus and the way friendship and faith intertwine in the Christian life. When Jesus walked alongside two confused disciples, He met them in their questions, in their grief, and in their search for clarity—just as He does with us today. Drawing from Luke 24, the lives of Perpetua and Felicity, and the wisdom of St. Bernard of Clairvaux, we’ll discuss how friendship is essential to holiness, how Christ is present in our shared struggles, and why discipleship isn’t meant to be done alone. If you've ever wrestled with doubt, isolation, or the mystery of God’s plan, this episode will remind you that the Third Traveler always walks beside you.

Transcribed - Published: 3 March 2025

Friendship and holiness are deeply intertwined in the way of Jesus. In this episode of Dad Tired, we explore Jesus’ command to lay down our lives for our friends (John 15:13) and how true friendship reflects the heart of God. While Judas betrayed friendship, Jesus embodied it offering Himself fully for those He loved. What does it mean for us as dads, husbands, and men of faith to live out sacrificial friendship? How does holiness shape the way we love those around us? Join us as we unpack these themes and challenge ourselves to follow Christ’s example.

Transcribed - Published: 24 February 2025

In this episode, Kaleb Allen dives into John 14:27—"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid." We explore how Jesus' words challenge the mental loops that trap us in anxiety, self-reliance, and fear. What happens when we allow the external, unshakable truth of God’s Word to interrupt our internal dialogue?

Transcribed - Published: 17 February 2025

How do we reconcile the character of God with the violence in the Old Testament? In this episode, Chris helps us wrestle with one of the most difficult theological questions: Does God’s command for destruction in the Old Testament align with His justice, mercy, and love? We explore biblical context, historical considerations, and theological perspectives to bring clarity to this challenging topic.

Transcribed - Published: 10 February 2025

Check out dwell for 25% OFF at: dwellbible.com/dadtired Biblical stewardship is the God-given responsibility to wisely manage time, talents, and resources for His glory and the benefit of others. It reflects faithfulness, generosity, and a heart aligned with God’s purposes in every aspect of life.

Transcribed - Published: 3 February 2025

In this follow-up episode, Pastor Chris Hilken continues the conversation on the morality of God in the Old Testament, tackling some of the most challenging and thought-provoking questions that arise from scripture. With a focus on helping fathers shepherd their families, Chris addresses the tension between God’s justice and mercy, exploring stories of divine judgment and their place in the grand narrative of redemption.

Transcribed - Published: 27 January 2025

Pastor Chris Hilken tackles the tough questions about God’s morality in the Old Testament. From stories of judgment to divine commands, Chris helps dads reconcile these challenging passages with God’s love and justice. Tune in for practical insights to strengthen your faith and lead your family well.

Transcribed - Published: 20 January 2025

On this episode of the Dad Tired podcast, Kaleb sits down with authors Patrick Miller to discuss his new book, Joyful Outsiders. Together, they explore what it means to live with joy, hope, and purpose in a culture where faith often feels out of place

Transcribed - Published: 13 January 2025

Kaleb’s Dad Tired episode on James 5:16-18 highlighted Elijah’s prayer life as a model of faith and perseverance. Drawing from the passage where James emphasizes the "prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working," Kaleb unpacked how Elijah’s prayers were both bold and persistent while unpacking church history's tradition concerning James' prayer life. Make sure to connect with dwell at: dwellbible.com/dadtired

Transcribed - Published: 6 January 2025

In this heartfelt episode of Dad Tired, Kaleb sits down with pastor, author, and entrepreneur John Onwuchekwa to explore life’s deepest challenges and God’s unshakable hope. John shares his journey through profound loss, including the death of his brother and struggles with infertility, and how these experiences shaped his faith, fatherhood, and calling. Together, they discuss practical ways to navigate grief, the power of community, and finding purpose in the midst of pain.

Transcribed - Published: 30 December 2024

Join Kaleb and Peter Ostapkowe founder of the Kinsman Journal as they discuss practical tools for effective communication, building community with fellow dads, and adopting strategies to become stronger, more resilient role models for our families. Check out the Kinsman Journal at https://kinsmen.org

Transcribed - Published: 23 December 2024

In this episode of Dad Tired, we dive into Daniel 6, unpacking the powerful story of Daniel's unwavering commitment to prayer, even in the face of life-threatening danger. Daniel’s courage reminds us that our convictions matter, especially when the stakes are high. Join us as we explore how to cultivate a prayer life that anchors us in trust, inspires our families, and honors God, no matter the challenges we face.

Transcribed - Published: 16 December 2024

In this episode, we dive into the life and prayer habits of John Hyde, also known as "Praying Hyde," a missionary whose fervent intercession transformed lives in India and beyond. Discover how his relentless pursuit of God's presence challenges and inspires us as husbands, fathers, and leaders in our homes.

Transcribed - Published: 9 December 2024

In this episode of the DadTired podcast, we sit down with acclaimed author and speaker Bob Sorge to explore the transformative truths behind his classic book, Secrets of the Secret Place. Bob shares profound insights on cultivating a deeper, more intimate relationship with God through personal devotion and prayer. Together, we unpack practical tips for busy dads seeking to create a vibrant secret place with God amidst the chaos of daily life. Discover how prioritizing this sacred space can revolutionize your role as a husband, father, and leader. This conversation is a must-listen for men longing to grow spiritually and leave a lasting legacy for their families.

Transcribed - Published: 2 December 2024

In this heartfelt episode, Jerrad Lopes shares his personal struggles and the challenges he has faced over the past weeks. He reflects on the origins of the Dad Tired podcast, the importance of confronting sin, and the need for healing and support from the community. Jerrad emphasizes the significance of honesty and vulnerability in his journey, expressing a desire to step back and seek restoration for himself and his family.

Transcribed - Published: 25 November 2024

Pastor Kaleb explores the themes of revival culture, the importance of pure motivation in spiritual life, and the dangers of a workspace mentality. He emphasizes that true devotion should stem from thankfulness for the cross of Jesus, rather than from selfish ambition or the desire for recognition. The episode highlights the need for self-awareness in one's spiritual journey and the significance of maintaining a genuine relationship with God.

Transcribed - Published: 18 November 2024

In this episode, Pastor Kaleb Allen discusses his personal struggles with fatigue and the subsequent return of motivation, exploring the addictive nature of productivity. He emphasizes the importance of devotion to God over mere productivity, referencing Kierkegaard's philosophy on single-minded devotion. Allen warns against fractured motivations in the Christian life and highlights the need for intentionality, attention, and perseverance in one's devotion to Jesus.

Transcribed - Published: 13 November 2024

In this engaging conversation, Jerrad and Laura Wifler reconnect after years apart, discussing Laura's journey as the co-founder of Risen Motherhood, her passion for writing poetry, and the unexpected success of their podcast. They delve into the decision to sunset Risen Motherhood, emphasizing the importance of protecting their family and the content they created. The conversation also touches on practical insights for dads and husbands, highlighting the significance of small acts of service in a marriage. In this conversation, Laura Wifler discusses the complexities of motherhood, marriage, and parenting through a gospel-centered lens. She highlights the invisible labor that mothers often carry, the importance of communication in relationships, and how to navigate the mental load of family responsibilities. Laura also shares her personal journey with her daughter's disabilities and how it has shaped her faith and ministry, emphasizing the hope found in community and God's purpose in pain.

Transcribed - Published: 11 November 2024

In this episode, Chris Hilken addresses various questions related to biblical perspectives on birth control, the nature of conversations between God and Satan, the concept of salvation before the gospel, and how to discuss sensitive topics like masturbation with children. He emphasizes the importance of understanding God's intentions for family and sexuality, and the necessity of evangelism for those who have not heard the gospel.

Transcribed - Published: 8 November 2024

In this conversation, Kaleb Allen and Seth Bumgarner discuss the life and legacy of David Brainerd, a missionary known for his struggles and perseverance in the wilderness of life. They explore themes of friendship, the importance of acknowledging one's struggles, and the selflessness that can emerge from difficult seasons. The discussion emphasizes that a life dedicated to serving Jesus, even amidst trials, can lead to a profound legacy that inspires others.

Transcribed - Published: 6 November 2024

In this conversation, David Pollock shares his journey from being an NFL player to a devoted father and husband. He discusses the challenges he faced after a career-ending neck injury and how it shaped his perspective on life, faith, and family. David emphasizes the importance of personal growth through trials and the role of faith in his life. He also reflects on his parenting style and the dynamics of his marriage, highlighting the significance of having a supportive partner. In this conversation, David and Jerrad explore the themes of faith, personal growth, and parenting in a performance-driven world. They discuss the importance of discipline in both faith and life, the challenges of parenting in today's society, and the role of sports as a teacher of life lessons. The conversation emphasizes the need for balance between sports and spirituality, and the significance of instilling values in children that prioritize character over performance.

Transcribed - Published: 4 November 2024

In this episode, Pastor Chris Hilken addresses several pressing questions regarding faith, sin, and relationships. He discusses the struggle with sin, particularly addiction to pornography, and the implications for salvation. He emphasizes the importance of viewing sin seriously and the need for genuine repentance. The conversation then shifts to the interpretation of biblical texts, particularly the distinction between allegorical and literal readings. Chris also explores the complexities of friendships between men and women, highlighting the potential dangers and the wisdom of maintaining boundaries. Finally, he addresses the topic of divorce and remarriage, providing insight into biblical teachings and the importance of seeking forgiveness and moving forward with grace.

Transcribed - Published: 1 November 2024

In this episode, Kaleb explores the theme of navigating the wilderness in life, drawing on historical examples like Dietrich Bonhoeffer to illustrate the struggle with identity and purpose during challenging times. He emphasizes the importance of turning aside to God, approaching Him with reverence, and focusing on who God is rather than solely on personal identity. Practical steps for engaging with God in wilderness seasons are also discussed, encouraging listeners to seek solitude, adoration, and a deeper understanding of God's character.

Transcribed - Published: 30 October 2024

In this episode, Jerrad shares personal anecdotes about the challenges of parenthood and the emotional turmoil that can arise unexpectedly. He emphasizes the importance of identifying the lies we believe about ourselves and the necessity of surrounding ourselves with friends who can speak truth into our lives. Ultimately, he encourages listeners to embrace their identity in Christ and find freedom in the truth.

Transcribed - Published: 28 October 2024

In this episode, Chris Hilken addresses profound questions about forgiveness, sexuality, communion, and the afterlife. He emphasizes the importance of understanding God's grace in the context of self-forgiveness, explores the complexities of sexual identity and its implications for faith, discusses the symbolic nature of communion in Christianity, and clarifies misconceptions about the visibility of loved ones in heaven. Through thoughtful insights and theological perspectives, Chris provides a compassionate and nuanced approach to these significant topics. Chapters 00:00 Understanding Forgiveness: A Journey Within 03:37 Exploring Sexuality: Nature vs. Nurture 14:06 The Symbolism of Communion: A Theological Perspective 18:54 The Afterlife: Can Loved Ones See Us? Submit your questions at dadtired.com/question

Transcribed - Published: 25 October 2024

In this episode, Kaleb Allen dives deep into the story of Elijah's wilderness experience and how it relates to the spiritual highs and lows we all face. Using 1 Kings 19 as a foundation, Kaleb reflects on Elijah’s journey from calling down fire on Mount Carmel to feeling utterly defeated and lying under a broom tree, asking God to take his life. Kaleb unpacks the lessons we can learn from Elijah about not taking ourselves too seriously, the importance of caring for our physical bodies, receiving God's love, listening for His voice in the quiet, and allowing God to renew our purpose. This episode is for anyone feeling worn out, frustrated, or spiritually dry. Through Elijah’s story, Kaleb offers practical wisdom and biblical encouragement to keep pressing on even in the wilderness moments of our lives. Whether you’re battling fatigue, discouragement, or the temptation to give up, this episode will help you find Jesus in the wilderness of your soul and remind you that God’s plans for you are not finished yet. Timestamps: 00:00 – Introduction to Part 4 of the 6-week series: Kaleb reflects on "pastor's fatigue" and the emotional crash after a Sunday of preaching. 01:50 – How adrenaline-filled Sundays often lead to discouraged Mondays and how relatable Elijah’s story is in this context. 02:24 – 1 Kings 19:4: Elijah prays to God asking to take his life. How Elijah’s despair speaks to the wilderness moments we face in life. 04:49 – Point 1: Don’t take yourself too seriously. Elijah’s dramatic prayer and the importance of laughing at ourselves in difficult moments. 07:11 – God’s response to Elijah: He sends an angel to feed Elijah instead of rebuking him. The kindness and grace of God in our weakest moments. 09:32 – Point 2: Taking care of your physical body is essential. Addressing the spiritual and physiological connections in wilderness seasons. 11:55 – Point 3: Let God love you. The importance of receiving God's love even when we feel we’ve failed or are frustrated with ourselves. 14:16 – Elijah’s search for God in the dramatic (earthquake, fire, wind) and realizing that God often speaks in the gentle whisper. 16:42 – Personal reflection: Kaleb shares a story about fatherlessness and the temptation dads face to give up when feeling unappreciated. 18:25 – Practical steps: Laugh at yourself, care for your body, let God love you, listen for God's whisper, and allow Him to renew your vision. 20:49 – Reflection on immaturity: God lavishes His love on us even in our immaturity. How we can receive His grace no matter where we are in life. 23:12 – Final encouragement: Elijah’s highs and lows illustrate God’s mercy. Even when Elijah wanted to give up, God still had a plan for him. 23:55 – Closing thoughts: Press on, even when you're in the wilderness, and lean into God’s plans and love. Connect with Us: Instagram: @dad.tired Website: DadTired.com Leave a Review: If this episode encouraged you, please leave a review and share it with a friend!

Transcribed - Published: 23 October 2024

In this powerful and raw episode of the Dad Tired podcast, Jerrad sits down with Pedro LaTorre, speaker, author, and coach, to dive deep into Pedro's personal story of fatherhood, healing, and breaking free from performance-driven living. From childhood trauma to finding freedom in Jesus, Pedro shares how his life experiences have shaped him as a father and husband. Key Moments: [00:01] – Jerrad introduces Pedro amidst the chaos of a flooded house and sets the tone for an honest conversation. [01:26] – Pedro shares his background: being half Puerto Rican, half Cuban, and growing up with a name that confuses people. [03:16] – Daddy-daughter day with Pedro's 3-year-old and the small moments that matter most. [05:35] – Pedro talks about the emotional healing journey that helped him become more present as a father. [07:58] – Discussing the importance of knowing God enjoys us, and how that fuels us to enjoy our families. [08:41] – Pedro opens up about the deep pain caused by his father leaving and childhood abuse, which led to a performance addiction in his life. [11:36] – The turning point in Pedro’s life after an injury ended his professional baseball dreams and led him into ministry. [16:16] – The “performance addiction” Pedro struggled with and how it impacted his relationships, including his marriage. [19:12] – Pedro talks about how COVID shut down his life in LA and how he dealt with the struggle of being still. [27:58] – What it means that Jesus’ sacrifice was covenantal, not transactional, and how that changes our lives as fathers. [36:53] – Pedro recounts the life-changing moment when he asked his wife, “What’s it like being married to me?” [47:16] – The importance of community, healing, and embracing feelings to live out the life God intends for us as men. Resources Mentioned: Tin Man Ministries – Emotional wellness resources for men Dr. Chip Dodd’s "Voice of the Heart" – A recommended book on emotional healing

Transcribed - Published: 21 October 2024

In this special Q&A episode, Chris Hilken tackles listener-submitted questions with raw honesty and biblical insight. This episode is part of a new segment on the Dad Tired podcast, called Q&A with Chris, where listeners can anonymously submit their burning questions. Jerrad Lopes curates a range of questions, aiming to get Chris’s off-the-cuff thoughts. Episode Highlights: What’s Off-Limits in the Bedroom for Christian Couples? Chris opens with a challenging question: is there anything off-limits for a Christian husband and wife in the bedroom? He offers a deep theological answer, explaining how sex within marriage reflects the union between Christ and His church, which means certain acts may break this analogy and should be avoided. He talks about the importance of mutual consent and avoiding harm while addressing the limits of biblical intimacy. Time Stamp: 00:01 - 04:20 Is Church Membership Biblical? Chris passionately argues for the importance of church membership, explaining why commitment to a local body is essential for spiritual growth. He contrasts modern consumeristic church culture with the early church’s structure, explaining how membership fosters accountability, biblical discipline, and stronger church communities. Time Stamp: 04:49 - 11:37 The Baptism of the Holy Spirit Explained Diving into one of the more theologically complex questions, Chris explores the idea of the baptism of the Holy Spirit. He explains how different denominations view this concept and where the idea of receiving spiritual gifts post-conversion stems from, while also offering his own perspective on how the Holy Spirit works in the believer’s life. Time Stamp: 13:45 - 16:36 Burial vs. Cremation: Is There a Biblical Stance? Chris answers whether there’s a biblical mandate regarding burial versus cremation. Drawing from personal experience and scriptural principles, he explains why Christians have the liberty to choose either option without fear that cremation undermines the resurrection. Time Stamp: 18:32 - 20:10 Submit Your Question: Got a burning question for Chris? Submit it anonymously at dadtired.com/question, and it might be featured in a future episode!

Transcribed - Published: 18 October 2024

In this episode of Kaleb’s Corner, a segment of the Dad Tired podcast, Kaleb Allen hosts part three of the six-week series titled Finding Jesus in the Wilderness of Your Soul. In this episode, Kaleb dives into the theme of how Jesus’ wilderness experience offers a roadmap for navigating the trials and challenges we face today. As Christian dads, learning to lead ourselves and our families well through tough seasons is essential, and Kaleb offers insights, encouragement, and practical steps to do just that. Episode Highlights: Wilderness: The Crossroads of Growth or Stagnation Kaleb kicks off by explaining how wilderness seasons can either shape us into stronger followers of Christ or leave us crippled by fear and frustration. He shares personal reflections on how wilderness moments challenge our faith and force us to choose between pressing forward or retreating in discouragement. Time Stamp: 00:14 - 02:40 Engaging God in the Midst of Spiritual Fog Kaleb encourages listeners not to "check out" during difficult times but to press deeper into God. He discusses the importance of wrestling with our emotions, praying, journaling, and talking to trusted friends, using these wilderness seasons as opportunities for spiritual growth and soul-searching. Time Stamp: 02:40 - 05:02 Jesus in the Wilderness: An Example of Endurance Kaleb unpacks Jesus’ experience of being led by the Spirit into the wilderness, showing how He modeled endurance through prayer, fasting, and resisting temptation. Jesus’ journey reminds us that even when we feel spiritually dry, God’s purpose is at work in us. Time Stamp: 05:02 - 07:27 Three Temptations: Relevance, Spectacle, and Power Kaleb walks listeners through the three temptations Jesus faced in the wilderness, drawing on insights from theologians like Augustine and Henry Nowen: Relevance: The temptation to turn stones into bread, fulfilling immediate needs but missing the deeper spiritual purpose. Spectacle: The temptation to throw Himself from the temple and be admired for a grand display of power. Power: The temptation to bow down and gain authority over all the kingdoms of the world. Time Stamp: 07:27 - 16:57 Resisting the Temptation of Relevance Kaleb explores how the temptation to prove our worth to others can creep in during wilderness seasons. He offers practical advice on resisting the need to be "relevant" in the eyes of the world and instead finding our value in God’s love and truth. Time Stamp: 16:57 - 19:18 Choosing to Be Faithful Instead of Spectacular Kaleb emphasizes that true success in the wilderness isn’t found in being extraordinary but in being faithful. He challenges listeners to reject the cultural pressure to "prove" themselves through grand gestures and instead focus on daily faithfulness to God’s calling. Time Stamp: 19:18 - 24:02 Embracing Humility: The Temptation to Power Kaleb addresses the temptation to seek control or power as a way to validate ourselves. He explains that true fulfillment comes not from climbing the ladder of success but from walking in humility and surrender to God’s will. Time Stamp: 24:02 - 28:49 The Wilderness as a Place of Growth Kaleb concludes by reframing the wilderness as a place of training, where God shapes our character and strengthens our faith. He encourages dads to embrace these challenging seasons as opportunities to become more like Jesus and lead their families well through faith and perseverance. Time Stamp: 28:49 - 31:10 Connect with Kaleb Allen: Website: Dad Tired Instagram: @t.kaleb.allen Podcast: Available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and all major platforms. Resources Mentioned: The Armor of God (Ephesians 6) The Life of Jesus in the Wilderness (Matthew 4) Writings by Henry Nowen and Augustine In this powerful solo episode, Kaleb Allen challenges dads to embrace the wilderness seasons of life as opportunities for growth, perseverance, and deepening their relationship with Christ.

Transcribed - Published: 16 October 2024

Jerrad Lopes of Dad Tired and singer-songwriter Matthew West team up for a heartfelt and impactful conversation. The pair dive into fatherhood, faith, and how their journeys have shaped them as husbands, dads, and men of God. Highlights: Blending Two Worlds: Dad Tired Meets The Matthew West Podcast Jerrad Lopes and Matthew West kick off the episode with a lighthearted exchange about their first-ever podcast crossover. They reflect on how they met backstage at one of Matthew’s concerts and how their connection with mutual friend Micah Tyler led to this collaboration. The Birth of Dad Tired: Jerrad's Journey Jerrad shares the raw story behind the creation of Dad Tired, recounting the darkest season of his life when he was ready to walk away from ministry, marriage, and fatherhood. A moment of grace from his wife shifted everything, leading to a viral blog post and the start of the Dad Tired movement. Marriage in Crisis: How God's Kindness Saved It In a vulnerable moment, Jerrad opens up about the time he considered divorce, only to be stopped in his tracks when his wife shared how she had been praying for his heart to return to Jesus. This moment was the catalyst for restoring his marriage and reigniting his faith. Why Vulnerability Matters: Encouraging Dads to Be Real Matthew and Jerrad discuss the power of vulnerability, especially for men, and how sharing their struggles and emotional moments—like crying as dads—can create a deeper connection with their families and audience. They swap stories about shedding tears while dropping their kids off at school and the emotions that come with being a father. Handling Criticism and Staying Focused on the Mission Both hosts reflect on their experiences with online criticism and cancel culture, particularly when stepping into sensitive topics. Jerrad shares his strategy for staying focused on the mission of pointing people to Jesus, despite the noise of negativity. Matthew recounts a time when he faced backlash for a song and how his family rallied around him. Raising Kids in a World Full of Lies: Discipleship and Truth Jerrad shares his approach to discipling his kids in today’s culture. He emphasizes the importance of teaching them to recognize truth according to God’s design while also instilling joy in their hearts. Both hosts talk about how they strive to create homes filled with joy and faith, despite the challenges of parenting in today's world. Spiritual Leadership: Life-on-the-Go Discipleship Jerrad explains his philosophy on discipleship, focusing on Deuteronomy 6’s "as you go" approach. He encourages dads to look for everyday, spontaneous moments to disciple their kids, rather than feeling pressure to have polished, planned devotionals. Matthew chimes in, reflecting on his own experience of balancing ministry, family, and fatherhood. Exciting New Ventures for Both Hosts Jerrad and Matthew close the episode by discussing their latest projects. Jerrad announces his role as the new co-host of Footbahlin with Ben Roethlisberger and his upcoming daily devotional podcast for men on the K-Love platform. Matthew reflects on the journey of balancing music, podcasting, and fatherhood, expressing his gratitude for the encouragement Jerrad gave him to keep his podcast going. Connect with Jerrad Lopes: Website: Dad Tired Instagram: @dad.tired Podcast: Available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you get your podcasts. Connect with Matthew West: Website: Matthew West Instagram: @matthewjwest Podcast: The Matthew West Podcast available on all major platforms. Resources Mentioned: Dad Tired Books (Available on Amazon) Footbahlin with Ben Roethlisberger Podcast This inspiring crossover episode is a must-listen for dads looking for real talk about fatherhood, faith, and staying true to their mission in life. Tune in for laughter, tears, and practical wisdom for everyday life as a Christian dad.

Transcribed - Published: 14 October 2024

In this engaging episode of the Dad Tired podcast, Jerrad Lopes sits down with guest Chris Hilken to tackle thought-provoking questions submitted anonymously by listeners. From biblical interpretations to everyday dilemmas, no topic is off-limits. Whether you’re curious about Cain and Abel’s wives, the age of the Earth, or navigating personal and spiritual boundaries, this episode is packed with insightful answers and honest reflections. Episode Highlights: (00:01:15) Introduction Jerrad introduces the episode's format, reminding listeners they can submit questions anonymously at dadtired.com/question. (00:30:65) Where Did Cain and Abel's Wives Come From? Chris delves into early biblical history, addressing the reality of incest in humanity's beginnings and how God’s laws evolved to forbid it. (02:39:07) Why Did People Live Such Long Lives in the Bible? Chris explores theories about human longevity in the Bible, including the protective firmament over the Earth and the wisdom behind God limiting human life to 120 years. (05:23:84) Does the Bible Mention Dinosaurs? A lively discussion about the existence of dinosaurs, their potential connection to the flood, and how some theologians interpret biblical creatures like Leviathan. (07:52:40) How Old Is the Earth? Chris explains the gap theory, suggesting the Earth is billions of years old while the Genesis creation account details a younger Earth made habitable by God. (10:43:51) Is It Okay to Masturbate to Photos of Your Wife? Tackling a sensitive topic, Chris offers a nuanced take, emphasizing the importance of caution, personal conviction, and staying aligned with biblical principles. (14:12:11) Jehovah’s Witnesses vs. Evangelical Christianity The core difference centers around the deity of Christ. Chris explains how Jehovah’s Witnesses view Jesus as subordinate to God, while evangelical Christians worship Him as God. (15:58:15) Why Did God Create the Devil? Chris unpacks the theological reasoning behind God's allowance of free creatures to rebel, pointing out that God’s glory is magnified through human choices. (17:41:31) The Shroud of Turin - Is It Real? Chris shares his belief in the authenticity of the Shroud of Turin, diving into the evidence and explaining why some people dismiss it while he finds it compelling. (22:27:38) Conclusion Jerrad wraps up the episode by encouraging listeners to submit more questions and teasing future episodes. Call to Action: Submit your anonymous questions for the next Q&A episode at dadtired.com/question. We’d love to hear from you! Be sure to tune in next week for more insights, laughter, and challenges as Jerrad and Chris tackle the topics that matter to dads, husbands, and followers of Jesus. Subscribe and Follow: Website: DadTired.com Instagram: @dad.tired

Transcribed - Published: 11 October 2024

In this episode, Kaleb continues his journey through the spiritual wilderness, exploring how we can encounter Jesus in the dry, desolate seasons of life. Drawing from personal experiences and biblical wisdom, Kaleb shares practical insights on recognizing God's presence when it feels like He's distant. He helps listeners navigate feelings of isolation, confusion, and spiritual drought, offering encouragement and hope for those in the wilderness of their souls. This is part two of the six-week series, and Kaleb delves deeper into themes of surrender, trust, and finding peace amidst life's chaos. If you've ever felt like you're wandering without direction or struggling to hear God's voice, this episode is for you. Reflection Questions: When was the last time you felt like you were in a spiritual wilderness? How did it affect your relationship with God? What specific areas of your life are you finding it difficult to trust God in right now? How do you typically respond when God feels distant or silent? What might change if you leaned into that silence instead of running from it? How can you intentionally seek Jesus in the quiet moments of your day, even when it feels like He’s far away? Think about a time when God met you in an unexpected way. How can that experience shape how you approach current struggles? Listener Questions: Kaleb loves hearing from the Dad Tired community! Feel free to email any thoughts, questions, or reflections to Kaleb at [email protected].

Transcribed - Published: 9 October 2024

In today's episode, Jerrad Lopes takes us on a journey of parenting and spiritual leadership through a real, honest experience that led to a powerful realization about how we, as fathers, can better lead our families. Jerrad shares the importance of knowing each of our family members on an individual level—knowing their unique needs, challenges, and spiritual journeys. Drawing parallels to the way Jesus knew His followers, Jerrad challenges dads to take time to study their children and wives, to know their spiritual conditions, and to lead each one uniquely. This episode is about taking a step beyond the general approach of parenting and truly becoming a student of our family members, to help them grow closer to Jesus. Reflection Questions (mentioned in episode): What is each family member in your household passionate about right now? How does that relate to their faith, and are there opportunities for connecting their passions with their spiritual growth? What challenges is each family member facing right now, and how might that affect their spiritual journey? How do they respond to prayer, Bible discussions, or spiritual conversations? Are they open, or do they feel reluctant? Are there any things about God, faith, church, or the Bible that are confusing or hard for them to understand? When do they feel closest to God? Is there a particular environment or activity where they feel a stronger connection? Where is each family member currently at in their spiritual journey? Are they learning about God, skeptical, or committed but struggling? What specific goals do you have to help each family member grow closer to Jesus? How can you create a plan to meet those goals through regular one-on-one time? Action Steps: Write down each family member’s name and identify where they are in their spiritual journey. Set a specific goal for each member to help them grow closer to Jesus. Plan a time for one-on-one connection each week or month to check in on their hearts and spiritual journeys. Create a prayer list for each family member and pray for them intentionally. Journal your observations after each one-on-one time, and use these notes to inform your ongoing approach to shepherding your family. Join the Dad Tired Community: We are all in this together, trying to figure out how to lead our families spiritually. If you haven't yet, join our Dad Tired community to share your experiences, get support, and find more resources to help you on this journey. www.DadTired.com Mentioned Resources: Jesus Storybook Bible - a recommended resource for younger children to learn about God. Tales That Tell the Truth series from The Good Book Company - great for teaching young children stories from the Bible. Dad Tired Dinner Time Devotional Cards - practical tools to foster spiritual discussions with your family.

Transcribed - Published: 7 October 2024

In this brand-new segment of the Dad Tired podcast, Jerrad Lopes introduces "Q&A with Chris," featuring Chris Hilken. This weekly episode is inspired by the overwhelming response to a spontaneous Q&A session at the recent Dad Tired retreat. With nearly 300 men attending, Jerrad and Chris didn’t have time to answer all the questions on-site, so they’re diving in on the podcast to tackle them here—nothing is off limits! In this episode, Jerrad does his best to make Chris squirm with some thought-provoking and challenging questions. Key Topics Discussed: Hell and God's Presence (01:31) Chris explains how hell can be the absence of God if God is omnipresent, using the concept of kenosis (from Philippians 2) to describe God's ability to limit Himself. Baptism and Salvation (07:59) Chris shares why baptism is crucial in the Christian faith but clarifies that it is not what saves a person. He emphasizes obedience to Christ's lordship and references the thief on the cross. Gambling and Sports Betting (10:28) Is gambling a sin? Chris answers with the principle from 1 Corinthians: "Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial." He shares the dangers and when it may be permissible within a controlled, healthy context. Exploring and Colonizing Space (13:33) What does God think about space exploration and colonizing Mars? Chris unpacks the story of the Tower of Babel and why it shouldn't be used to argue against exploring space. Smoking Cigars or Cigarettes (15:40) Chris discusses if smoking is a sin, applying the same biblical principles used for other substances, like alcohol, and stressing moderation and self-control. Profanity and Taming the Tongue (17:36) Chris addresses the use of profanity among Christians, citing James and Ephesians to highlight the importance of wholesome speech and the impact our words have as believers. Listener Questions: Have a burning question for Chris? Submit it anonymously at dadtired.com/question, and tune in every Friday for a new episode of "Q&A with Chris." Notable Quotes: “Imagine a kingdom where a king issues a decree, and you take it under advisement personally—that’s not lordship. When God calls, we obey.” - Chris Hilken "Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial. It’s about asking, is this helping me be more like Jesus?" - Chris Hilken Call to Action: Submit your questions anonymously at dadtired.com/question to be answered in future episodes. Don’t miss out—new Q&A episodes drop every Friday! Connect with Us: Follow Dad Tired on Instagram: @dad.tired Join the Dad Tired community at dadtired.com Support the Podcast: If you found value in today’s episode, please consider leaving a review and sharing it with other dads who might benefit from the wisdom and insights shared here.

Transcribed - Published: 4 October 2024

In this episode Pastor Kaleb Allen explores the theme of spiritual wilderness, discussing the internal struggles many face despite external appearances of success. He draws on the teachings of St. John of the Cross, particularly the concepts of active and passive nights, to illustrate the journey of faith and the importance of detachment from worldly comforts. Kaleb emphasizes the necessity of relying on God during these challenging times and encourages listeners to trust in God's presence and work in their lives, even when they feel abandoned or dry. Key Scripture References: Matthew 4:1-11 - Jesus' wilderness experience and temptation. John 4:10 - Jesus offers living water to the Samaritan woman. Philippians 3:8 - Paul’s perspective on valuing Christ above all things. Isaiah 64:8 - The image of God as the potter and us as clay. Discussion& Reflection Questions: Reflect on a wilderness season in your life. How did God work in you during that time, and what was the outcome when you came out of it? Active vs. Passive Nights: Kaleb talks about active nights (where we initiate spiritual disciplines) and passive nights (where God takes the lead). Can you identify a season in your life that felt like each type? How did each contribute to your growth? Detachment: Are there things in your life that you've found yourself overly attached to for comfort or fulfillment? How might God be calling you to detach from these and rely on Him more fully? Trusting in God's Presence: When you're in a season where God feels distant, what practical steps can you take to keep trusting in His presence? How can this group help you in such times? Perseverance: What does perseverance look like for you when you're in the wilderness? What practices or habits help you hold on to God during these tough seasons?

Transcribed - Published: 2 October 2024

In this episode, Jerrad Lopes dives into the heart of Ephesians 5:25, exploring what it truly means for husbands to love their wives as Christ loves the church. Through powerful personal stories, practical insights, and deep theological truths, Jerrad challenges men to go beyond surface-level love and embrace a sacrificial, unconditional, and servant-hearted approach to marriage. This episode is packed with spiritual insights and practical takeaways to help husbands lead their wives well—emotionally, spiritually, and physically. Key Scripture References: Ephesians 5:25 – "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her." John 10:11 – "I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep." Romans 5:8 – "God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Colossians 3:13 – "Forgiving each other as the Lord has forgiven you." John 10:28-30 – "I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand." Chapters & Timestamps: [0:00] - Welcome & Dad Tired Retreat Recap Jerrad opens the episode by sharing the impact of the recent Dad Tired retreat, recounting powerful testimonies of how God is moving through the community of men. He discusses how a viral video from the retreat went on to inspire men all over the world. [09:30] - Loving Our Wives Like Christ Loves the Church The main theme of the episode kicks off as Jerrad reflects on the command in Ephesians 5:25 for husbands to love their wives as Christ loves the church. He shares personal stories about his early years of marriage and what he's learned about deepening intimacy through sacrifice and forgiveness. [14:00] - Intimacy Beyond Physical Connection Jerrad discusses how intimacy in marriage grows beyond the physical and becomes more about emotional and spiritual connection. He stresses the importance of being truly known by your spouse and creating a deeper bond through years of shared experiences. [19:00] - Theology of Marriage Exploring the biblical foundation of marriage, Jerrad explains why marriage is meant to be a reflection of God’s love for us. He breaks down what it means to mirror God’s sacrificial, unconditional love in the marriage relationship. [23:30] - Sacrificial Love in Marriage Drawing from scriptures like John 10:11 and Romans 5:8, Jerrad emphasizes the importance of husbands prioritizing their wives' needs and sacrificing their own comfort for their wives' well-being. He shares examples from his own marriage of what this looks like in everyday life. [28:30] - Unconditional Love & Forgiveness Jerrad delves into the challenges of loving unconditionally and forgiving consistently, even in the hardest seasons of marriage. He references Colossians 3:13 and John 10:28-30, offering practical advice on how to let go of grudges and truly forgive like Christ forgives. [35:00] - Spiritual Leadership in Marriage One of the key points in this episode is the role of the husband as the spiritual leader. Jerrad talks about nurturing his wife’s spiritual growth and how leading spiritually involves more than just teaching—it’s about encouraging and walking alongside your wife in her faith journey. [37:30] - The Servant-Hearted Husband Drawing from John 13, where Jesus washes the disciples' feet, Jerrad challenges men to embrace servant leadership in their homes. He gives practical examples of what it looks like to serve your wife humbly in everyday life, from doing the dishes to handling the bedtime routine. [40:15] - Protecting Your Wife Emotionally & Spiritually Jerrad explains the importance of protecting your wife, not just physically but emotionally and spiritually as well. He shares personal struggles he’s faced in his marriage and how he’s grown to ensure that his wife feels emotionally safe with him. [45:00] - Practical Declarations for Husbands To close the episode, Jerrad leads listeners through powerful declarations based on scripture. He encourages husbands to affirm their commitment to loving their wives sacrificially, unconditionally, and faithfully, just as Christ loves the church. Call to Action: Reflect on the scriptural declarations shared during this episode and take time to affirm your love and commitment to your wife, following Christ’s example. To further engage with the Dad Tired community, visit dadtired.com and consider partnering with the ministry.

Transcribed - Published: 30 September 2024

Summary In today's episode, Jerrad discusses the challenges of navigating busy seasons of life, particularly for parents. He emphasizes the importance of being intentional in relationships, especially with spouses and children, amidst the chaos of daily responsibilities. Jerrad shares insights on finding clarity in one's mission, the necessity of saying no to distractions, and practical steps to maintain focus on what truly matters. He also highlights the significance of rest and connection with God to fulfill one's calling effectively.

Transcribed - Published: 23 September 2024

Newt Crenshaw, the president and CEO of Young Life, a global ministry that reaches out to adolescents, discusses the relational ministry and the impact it has on young people. Young Life focuses on building relationships with young people through contact work, club meetings, campaigners (small group Bible studies), and camps. The study conducted by Young Life revealed that Gen Z and Gen Alpha desire authentic relationships, a sense of belonging, and stable relationships with adults. The study also highlighted the challenges young people face with social media and the importance of building resilience. Newt encourages parents to invest in their children's lives and be present for open window moments.

Transcribed - Published: 16 September 2024

Newt Crenshaw, the president and CEO of Young Life, a global ministry that reaches out to adolescents, discusses the relational ministry and the impact it has on young people. Young Life focuses on building relationships with young people through contact work, club meetings, campaigners (small group Bible studies), and camps. The study conducted by Young Life revealed that Gen Z and Gen Alpha desire authentic relationships, a sense of belonging, and stable relationships with adults. The study also highlighted the challenges young people face with social media and the importance of building resilience. Newt encourages parents to invest in their children's lives and be present for open window moments.

Transcribed - Published: 16 September 2024

The conversation begins with Jerrad Lopes promoting upcoming events in the Dad Tired ministry, including retreats and conferences. He emphasizes the importance of these events in helping men become the husbands and fathers God has called them to be. The conversation then transitions into a guided prayer session, where Lopes leads listeners in praying the Lord's Prayer and reflecting on themes of adoration, submission, provision, forgiveness, and protection. Lopes encourages listeners to make this guided prayer a regular practice to reset and refocus their hearts on God. Sponsor: http://heritagebooks.org/puritantreasures Promo code: dadtired

Transcribed - Published: 9 September 2024

Zach Williams, a Christian artist, shares his journey of faith and fatherhood. He talks about his transformation from a wild rocker to a follower of Jesus and how it impacted his parenting. Zach discusses the challenges of raising kids in the digital age and the importance of grace in parenting. He also shares about his new children's book, which teaches kids about the fruits of the spirit.

Transcribed - Published: 2 September 2024