Loss and Its Impact on Desire

Conversations with Dr. Jennifer

Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife

Self-improvement, Education, Mental Health, Sexuality, Health & Fitness

4.4 • 978 Ratings

🗓️ 1 February 2024

⏱️ 52 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Choosing to love with your whole heart means accepting the risk of disappointment, loss, and grief. These difficult realities come in many forms throughout a lifetime—unmet expectations, unfulfilled hopes and dreams, shifts in belief, broken promises, illness, and ultimately, death. Facing acute loss is a harrowing and sobering experience, in part because it wakes us up to just how little control we have over our circumstances. But being compassionate towards ourselves in the process and finding the courage to keep moving forward, even when the path is riddled with uncertainty and vulnerability, is a beautiful form of faith. When we take the disappointment and loss that life hands us and use our difficult experiences to become kinder, more compassionate people, we increase our ability to deeply cherish the good around us, and we increase our capacity for joy. This NEW episode is the audio from a Q&A session that Dr. Finlayson-Fife hosted on the topic of loss and grief. During the conversation, Dr. Finlayson-Fife took questions about all different types of losses including miscarriage, death, broken promises, and frustrated expectations. Listen to the full episode to learn more about: * Intimacy after loss * Mixed-faith marriages * Intimacy after miscarriage * Finding the courage to reinvest in life after loss You can watch the full recording of this Q&A session HERE. You can learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife's new mini-courses HERE.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to Conversations with Dr. Jennifer, a collection of interviews on the topics of relationships, sexuality, and more, all featuring Dr Finlason Fife.
0:27.6	Hey everyone. I just wanted to let you know that we just launched three new mini courses. These mini courses were designed for those seeking meaningful change
0:32.0	in their lives and relationships without the time or for those a perfect gift or introduction to my material. Right now we have a mini course for
0:44.3	newlyweds, one on intimate deception, and also one that outlines many of the common
0:50.2	cultural myths that interfere with good intimate sexuality, and we hope to be adding to this collection soon so you can click on the
0:57.7	link in the show notes to learn more.
1:00.8	Welcome. We're going to talk today a little bit about loss and its impact on desire and
1:12.0	specifically when that's different in a couple which it often is where one
1:17.6	handles loss through increased desire and another handles loss through a decrease in desire. I do want to say I'm speaking to this
1:26.2	topic without the experience that some of you have had, reading through some of these
1:32.4	heartbreaking questions where some have
1:36.3	suffered really grave difficult losses, like just really life altering grief.
1:45.0	And so I'm speaking with just, you know,
1:50.0	some of my thoughts on this,
1:52.0	but there is no right way to grieve and there are no easy
1:56.0	answers and I certainly know less about this through lived experience than some of you. So I do really welcome your
2:05.2	thoughts and your experiences and any hard-earned wisdom that some of you have. I mean
2:11.6	that said it's also true that you can't really get through life without loss
2:18.9	and a minimum, you know, loss of what you had hoped or expected life to be or at least some of the
2:27.1	idealism about what life should bring you or offer you in response to your efforts.
2:33.2	And so much of life, and I think even midlife crisis
2:38.4	is often a kind of reorienting
	...

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