4.4 • 978 Ratings
🗓️ 9 April 2024
⏱️ 56 minutes
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0:00.0 | Welcome to Conversations with Dr. Jennifer, a collection of interviews on the topics of relationships, sexuality, and more, all featuring Dr Finlason Fife. |
0:29.7 | Hey everyone, listening to Room for 2 will help you see how to take the concepts I talk about in podcast episodes like this one, as well as in my online courses, and apply them to your own life and relationships. |
0:37.0 | Listening to other couples work with me will help you see that you're not alone in your struggles, |
0:41.0 | and will show you what you can do to create real change. |
0:45.0 | Click the link in our show notes to learn more about subscribing. |
0:50.0 | Welcome everybody. |
0:52.0 | Today we're going to talk about regret, remorse, and |
0:57.2 | resentment. The three hours of misery. Okay. So I want to just talk about how I think about each one of those first and then I'll address some of the questions that Christie compiled for me that are coming from the |
1:13.0 | asking elders marriage and sexuality therapist group. |
1:17.0 | So let's start with remorse. |
1:19.0 | So remorse is a feeling, it's when we feel bad about a bad thing that we've done. |
1:28.0 | It's the emotion we feel when we confront that our behavior is not in line with our ideals or the kind of person that we |
1:39.7 | Respect and it's a very, very valuable emotion, even though it's an uncomfortable one, because |
1:48.5 | remorse always moves you forward. So remorse is like, I don't like that I've done that and I am going to do that differently. |
1:57.1 | I am not proud of that behavior and I have to do better. |
2:02.2 | And so it's really measured by new action. |
2:05.8 | It isn't measured by feeling bad about yourself |
2:08.4 | or feeling you're a terrible person. |
2:10.4 | You may feel some of those feelings. |
2:12.4 | But the measure is really in changing and |
2:15.8 | acknowledging that's not okay with me to indulge in that behavior or to treat somebody that way, I have to do better. |
2:25.0 | So it leads to change. |
... |
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