S3, Ep 5 Friendship Therapy: Ambivalence in Friendship - what happens when your friend becomes your boss?

Friendship Therapy

Emma Reed Turrell

Society & Culture, Relationships, Mental Health, Health & Fitness

4.8 • 1.2K Ratings

🗓️ 2 December 2024

⏱️ 45 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Welcome back to Friendship Therapy, the podcast in which psychotherapist and author Emma Reed Turrell talks to real people about real friendships and looks at these pivotal relationships through a therapeutic lens.

This week, Emma meets Kelly, a smart, self-aware woman who's nearly 50, yet who finds herself stuck with some big feelings about a friendship that ended 18 months ago, when her friend of 17 years became her boss and the friendship fell apart.

In this episode, Emma introduces Kelly to the 'ambivalence seesaw', a tool we can use whenever we're feeling stuck to help us make a decision or find closure. Kelly comes to understand how her experiences growing up might have stacked the cards against her when it comes to certain friendships, and how her ability to manage upwards might make her the perfect deputy or number one number two - but it might not leave much room for her to succeed.

If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast, please click the link below to fill out the form:
https://forms.gle/9yZAVgF9BbyKhwsV7

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Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.

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Social media:

Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell
Friendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypod
Email: [email protected]

Transcript

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0:00.0	Toner and ink. Get yours in a blink. And for less than you think at cartridge people.com for
0:04.9	unbeatable prices. Cartridge people. Printing, sorted. See online for our price promise.
0:11.4	Welcome to Friendship Therapy, the podcast in which we look at friendships through a therapeutic lens.
0:18.1	This week, I'm talking to Kelly, a smart smart self-aware woman who's nearly 50, yet who
0:24.6	finds herself stuck with some big feelings about a friendship that ended 18 months ago, when her
0:30.6	friend of 17 years became her boss and the friendship fell apart. I introduced Kelly to my ambivalence seesaw, a tool we can use
0:40.8	whenever we're feeling stuck to help us make a decision or find closure. And Kelly comes to understand
0:47.4	how her experiences growing up might have stacked the cards against her when it comes to certain
0:53.4	friendships, how her ability to manage upwards might have stacked the cards against her when it comes to certain friendships.
1:01.8	How her ability to manage upwards might make her the perfect deputy or the number one number two,
1:05.4	but it might not leave much room for her to succeed.
1:09.3	Let me know if the ambivalence Cecil helps you.
1:12.5	And in the meantime, I hope you enjoy this episode.
1:21.7	Hi, Kelly. How can I help? Hi, Emma. Thank you so much to start with for having me on your podcast.
1:29.5	It feels a real honour to be here talking to you. So I originally contacted you. It's a work dilemma, I guess,
1:35.4	as well, what used to be, it's not so much anymore. And just how friendships play out when that friend that you've had for a really long time actually ends up being your boss. And the dynamics
1:43.1	of that and how that changes and how you can have the kind of work boss
1:48.0	employee relationship alongside what was a best friendship. So the person that this is in
1:57.4	relation to was a very good friend for a very long time before she became my boss.
2:02.5	We were friends for roughly around 17 years. She was a bridesmaid at my wedding. A friendship was
2:10.0	centred a lot around going to music gigs, festivals. You know, we did all of that kind of stuff
2:14.8	together. Our lives over that time changed an awful lot or minded, changed quite a bit.
	...

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