S5E10: Signs That You're The Toxic One in the Relationship

Cultivating H.E.R. Space: Uplifting Conversations for the Black Woman

Cultivating H.E.R. Space

Education, Self-improvement

4.7 • 1.3K Ratings

🗓️ 6 March 2020

⏱️ 53 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Lady, when was the last time you took a long hard look in the mirror to examine the negativity you may bring to your relationships? We know that doing so requires hard work and often a level of vulnerability that some of us will readily avoid. In today’s episode, Terri and Dom offer us ways to identify when and why we are the toxic ones in our relationships. They also share some of their toxic ways. Within that sharing, the ladies also provide us with concrete steps to take if we are ready for making a change in our behavior patterns. Be sure to tune in and also scroll below for more information on tips and resources mentioned in this episode. Quote of the Day: "Your toxicity in your relationships with other people is actually an extension of the toxicity in your relationship to yourself. What you have is not an issue with how you relate to others, but a fundamental trauma that is preventing you from being at ease within yourself. That is what you must address." - Brianna Wiest Takeaways: Signs it's you: All of your problems are someone else's fault You take more than you give There's so much drama You have a major superiority complex You’re a Debbie Downer You only express love or admiration when you need something. How to make the change Watch how people interact around you Monitor your own thoughts and actions Apologize more and seek understanding Identify the root of the toxicity and what must be done to heal Will I Ever Be Good Enough?: Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers The Self Compassion Deck Relevant Past Episodes: S5E3: A Fresh Perspective on Receiving Feedback and Managing Defensiveness S5E4: How Your Words Are Creating Your Current Reality (Put Some Respect on Your Name) S3E12: Healing Intergenerational Trauma with Dr. Thema Bryant-Davis Resources: Melanin and Mental Health Therapy for Black Girls Psychology Today Therapy for QPOC Where to find us: Twitter: @HERspacepodcast Instagram: @herspacepodcast Facebook: @herspacepodcast Website: herspacepodcast.com Email: [email protected] H.E.R Space Sanctuary: https://www.facebook.com/groups/herspacesanctuary/
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Transcript

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0:00.0	On BBC I am a player. I am doing life. A few more years means nothing to me.
0:06.0	I'm pregnant.
0:08.0	Drudges go easy, I'm pregnant women.
0:10.0	I've been old my electricity, that's all. I don't think I should even be in here.
0:14.0	A new series of the Bafter Award winning time.
0:18.0	You tell anyone and I mean anyone about me I will kill you. Starring Jody Whitaker, Tamara Lawrence and Bella Ramsey. Time. Watch on BBC
0:29.4	I player. Hey lady, is Dr. Dom here.
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1:05.2	her space I don't do that shit no more so you would pop the other person in the
1:10.7	mouse so just so we're clear you would physically put
1:17.8	your hands on someone else if they said something you didn't want to hear.
1:22.2	It was it's a little more nuanced than If they said something you didn't want to hear?
1:23.0	It was, it's a little more nuanced than that.
1:25.4	So it was, okay, so to be in again, it's wrong either way,
1:29.2	like I don't, I believe that women should not put their hands on men, men should not put their hands on women, women shouldn not put their hands on men
1:32.8	men should not put their hands on women women men should no one should put their
1:36.5	hands on anyone like that's point blank like we were taught in grade school
1:39.7	keep your hands to yourself
	...

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