The Island

Comedy of the Week

BBC

Comedy

4 • 2.8K Ratings

🗓️ 24 February 2025

⏱️ 15 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Fresh from his appearance on Radio 4's Desert Island Discs, actor Stephen Mangan finds himself in the kind of trouble where the Bible, the Complete Works of Shakespeare, and his luxury item will be no help whatsoever.

From Bill Dare (Dead Ringers), Jon Holmes (The Skewer) and writers Tom Oxenham and Simon Alcock, actor Stephen Mangan washes up on the actual island from Desert Island Discs, only to discover that he is not alone.

Living among the palms and rocky outcrops and thousands of copies of the Bible lying in the sand are every former guest of the show - and it’s all gone a bit Lord of the Flies.

Through Stephen’s audio diary, we learn that all TV chef Nadiya Hussain wants to do is hunt, that Richard Madeley’s gone feral, and that Sandi Toksvig has the Conch. But there’s something lurking in the forest, and when Stephen suspects foul play in the power struggle to be chief, he soon finds himself making a dangerous enemy.

Can he win over his fellow islanders before it’s too late? What lengths will he go to to survive? And what the hell is he going to do with this useless coffee machine he chose as his luxury item?

Written by Tom Oxenham and Simon Alcock Starring Stephen Mangan as himself

Sound Design: Tony Churnside Executive Producer: Jon Holmes Producer: Bill Dare

An unusual production for BBC Radio 4

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hello, you're about to listen to a BBC podcast, so I'd like to tell you where you'll find more just like it.
0:05.5	I'm Izzy Lee Poulton, an assistant commissioner for BBC Sounds, which means I'm involved in the whole podcast making process.
0:12.0	Whether that's developing fresh formats or facilitating eye-catching artwork, I helped project manage all the details that make our podcast stand out.
0:19.0	At the BBC, we've got access to storytellers and experts across a huge range of subjects.
0:24.6	It could be psychologists, comedians, celebrities or journalists.
0:28.6	No podcasts or day looks the same here.
0:31.6	So no matter what you like, check out BBC Sounds.
0:33.6	There's probably another podcast on there that you're absolutely love.
0:42.3	BBC Sounds, music, radio, podcasts.
0:50.3	The Island, Part 1 by Simon Alcock and Tom Oxenham, with Stephen Mangan as Stephen Mangan. Thank you. and mangan.
1:00.0	I fell to my knees,
1:01.8	dropped my things on the sand,
1:04.6	and scanned the horizon in the vain hope of rescue.
1:09.0	But out there was only the white of the surf which flinked on the reef,
1:11.8	and beyond that the deep blue of the open ocean.
1:14.9	Exhausted, I slumped onto my back.
1:18.7	How long I was out cold, I couldn't be sure.
1:27.7	I stirred only as a result of my parched throat, as well as several sharp jabs to my groin, face, armpit and buttock.
1:32.5	Half opening my eyes, I could see a dark shape looming over me.
1:39.5	This was it. Death come at last. The shape moved closer, blocking out the glare of the sun so I could see it distinctly for the first time, but nothing could have prepared me for the sight.
1:45.0	There, towering over me in the visible heat of the mid-afternoon, was Delia Smith, and she was
1:51.9	holding a large stick.
	...

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