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Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

Too Hot For The Gays | Your Mom's House Ep. 806

Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

Tom Segura

Comedy, Relationships, Society & Culture, Tv & Film, Comedy Interviews

4.723.4K Ratings

🗓️ 16 April 2025

⏱️ 76 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Get tickets for Tom’s Come Together Tour at https://tomsegura.com/tour SPONSORS: Go to http://helixsleep.com/YMH for 20% Off Sitewide Make life easier by getting harder and discover your options at https://bluechew.com! Try your first month of BlueChew FREE when you use promo code YMH -- just pay $5 shipping. Don’t miss out on all the action this week at DraftKings! Download the DraftKings app today! Sign-up using https://dkng.co/mom or through my promo code BURNING. Head to https://www.squarespace.com/MOM to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code MOM. It’s a big week in the Mommy Dome — Tommy Smurfday and Christina P kick things off with a beautiful clip reminding us that fisting is more than a hobby — it’s an identity. That flows nicely into some stories from a Por Osos gay bar takeover where Tom was apparently the belle of the very gay ball. Meanwhile, CP confesses she had a dream that Tom adopted a selfishly sinful life that involved slurping white, kinky clubbing, and hanging out with Charlize Theron. Then it’s time for a call with Tony Johns, who updates the Mommies on why he got kicked out of a local dive bar, his new OnlyFans photo hustle, and his upcoming scene with Alexis Fawx. Speaking of MILFs, Mother’s Day is around the corner, so consider grabbing one of Mommy Christina's latest lipsticks for that special broad in your life. We also get an Enny story about his dream girl who ruined it all with a single turd, and a deep dive into some toxic clips, some ladyboy goodness, and a TikTok buffet featuring sprite burps, gendered hair, buttered bread, tapi tapi, and a man with underwear on his head who may or may not be a genius. Plus Christina presents a dealbreaker scenario with a nudist and an environmentalist. This one’s packed tighter than a stuffed pet collection. Your Mom’s House Ep. 806 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://christinap.com/ https://store.ymhstudios.com https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER, (800) 327-5050 or visit http://gamblinghelplinema.org (MA). Call 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY). Please Gamble Responsibly. 888-789-7777/visit http://ccpg.org (CT) or visit http://www.mdgamblinghelp.org (MD). 21+ and present in most states. (18+ DC/KY/NH/WY). Void in ONT/OR/NH. Eligibility restrictions apply. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (KS). 1 per new customer. $5+ first-time bet req. Max. $200 issued as non-withdrawable Bonus Bets that expire in 7 days (168 hours). Stake removed from payout. Terms: http://sportsbook.draftkings.com/promos. Ends 5/18/25 at 11:59 PM ET. Sponsored by DK. Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:02:00 - Happy Smurfday 00:08:47 - Opening Clip: Brolapse 00:18:24 - Gay Bar Takeover & Christina's Dream 00:24:51 - Tony Johns Update 00:30:50 - Straight From The Worker's Mouth 00:40:51 - Mother's Day Lipstick Plug 00:41:19 - Clip: Different Level Woman 00:45:13 - Clip: Shopping For Cuties 00:47:44 - Nudist or Environmentalist? 00:52:11 - Enny's Inner Thoughts 00:59:17 - Christina's Curations 01:09:58 - Clip: Gender Affirming Pet Haircuts 01:11:15 - Clip: Masked Amigo 01:13:48 - Closing Song - "Let's Go Water Champ Tommy Buns Mix" by Sweet Mitchel Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

What's everybody this weekend? I'm going to be at the Excel Energy Center in St. Paul, Minnesota, Friday, April 18th, and then Alliance Energy Center in Madison, Wisconsin, Saturday, April 19th, during my Come Together tour. Get tickets now at tombsgare.com slash tour.

0:17.1

Welcome. Welcome to your mom's house. Ching ching ching ching ching chich ching chich ching chich ching chich ching ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch'on.

0:39.3

Oh, she gotta have a career and vision.

0:45.3

He gotta send her flowers on a tuesday.

0:49.3

Nowadays, I'd be like, oh, hell no, bitch.

0:55.0

Oh, I'm a bad mother because I make crazy-ass videos.

0:59.6

She don't care about nothing but her fucking nuts.

1:02.5

So whatever, come on, little side bitch.

1:04.0

Let's go get you some self-respect and dignity in a life.

1:07.1

Don't accidentally stick your dick in the wrong hole.

1:09.5

I'm allie. Stick your dick in the wrong hall. Take your dick in the wrong hole. I'm Holly. I'm Holly.

1:11.6

Dick your dick in a wrong hole.

1:12.6

I'm Holly.

1:13.6

I'm Holly.

1:14.6

I can't stand when somebody comment under one of my

1:17.6

my body.

1:18.6

My Molly.

1:19.6

My Molly.

1:20.6

Bitch out here sucking.

1:22.6

Bitch style here sucking.

1:23.6

Bitch style here sucking.

1:24.6

Bitch style here sucking.

...

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