Couples often enter marriage with high expectations, and are then dismayed to learn that marriage is not a fairy tale after all. What do you do when marriage doesn't make you happy? How can we break out of our selfish hopes and become the spouse God intends us to be?

Listen to learn practical ways to reconcile your marriage dreams with your married reality.  

We all have hopes and dreams for marriage, and the reality of life is that they don’t always play out the way we expected. We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.  

Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for quick weekly marriage tips!

Episode highlights include: 

• How your expectations before marriage impact your relationship

• The hidden role of selfishness in marital issues and conflicts

• How to cultivating humility helps to understand your spouse better

• Recognizing the redemptive nature of marriage can lead to deeper connections.

• Steps to finding a true and deeper joy in marriage

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Couples Conversation Guide:  

Main takeaway:  Unrealistic expectations of marriage are pretty common, but they can take away from enjoying the marriage you’re actually living. If marriage isn’t making you happy, then that’s your cue to start sowing into it.  

Questions to Discuss: 

1. What expectations did you bring into marriage that you later realized were unrealistic? 

2. What are some things you’d love to see more of in your marriage, and how can you work together to make that happen? 

3. Do you have friends who will give you hard feedback when needed? What step can you take to build a friendship like that? 

 

QUOTES 

• “A lot of people getting married have high hopes for marriage, then a few years into it they realize it’s not going to be their source of identity, hope and happiness. That realization kind of turns their world upside down.” - Chelsea Damon

• “What does God say about me? I had to do some soul searching to see what God has to say about me without trying to find that sense of security in my spouse.”  - Chelsea Damon

• “Marriage does a good of showing you who you are, and all of your faults. It’s a good wake up call for who you are as a person.”  - Chelsea Damon

• “One of the things couples find surprising are the expectations they don’t even know they’re bringing into marriage.”  - Chelsea Damon

• “I realized so much of my sense of security was not in the right place. I decided to put that back on Christ and find my identity in Him.” - Chelsea Damon

• “You need someone who’s willing to speak into your life.”  - Chelsea Damon

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:  

• Find Chelsea on her website, Instagram,  

• Grab a copy of Chelsea’s book, I Thought This Would Make Me Happy

• Shop Honoring Intimates for lingerie, lubricants and more with NO lewd images, and use our discount code AWESOMEMARRIAGE for 20% off!  

• Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for quick weekly marriage tips!