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Betrayal Trauma Recovery - BTR.ORG

What If I Can Never Trust My Husband Again? – Shelly’s Story

Betrayal Trauma Recovery - BTR.ORG

Anne Blythe, M.Ed.

Education, Sexuality, Relationships, Mental Health, Society & Culture, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness

4.61.4K Ratings

🗓️ 4 March 2025

⏱️ 36 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

If your husband's actions make him untrustworthy, here's what that means.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Welcome to Betrayal Trauma Recovery, BTR.org. I'm Anne. I'm sure you remember what it was like when you were searching for help, maybe for your husband, hoping to find the right program or therapist. That's why I started podcasting. I supported my husband through seven years of pornography addiction recovery and not one therapist during that time told me I was experiencing emotional

0:22.4

and psychological abuse and sexual coercion. I didn't want any other woman on the planet to be in

0:28.8

the dark. If you're like the majority of my listeners, you're experiencing the type of abuse that's

0:33.6

invisible and difficult to wrap your head around. Your husband is using porn or having

0:37.8

affairs or lying to you, and you're getting the same bad advice about how to improve communication

0:42.8

or your relationship. If you need support from women who totally understand, check out our daily

0:48.4

group session schedule at BTR.org slash group. We'd love to see you in a session today. One simple, anonymous way to help spread the word

0:56.7

is to click, follow, or subscribe to the Betrayal Trauma Recovery podcast on your favorite

1:01.5

podcasting app. While you're there, every five-star rating helps make this podcast more visible

1:07.0

and will help save other women from getting the wrong kind of help, like a couple

1:10.9

program that will make this type of abuse worse. For those of you who follow or subscribe to this

1:16.1

podcast, thank you so much. Your support means so much to me. I have a member of our community

1:22.4

on today's episode. I'm going to call her Shelley. She's here to share her story. Welcome, Shelly. Hi, thank you.

1:31.0

So Shelly has experienced betrayal trauma in multiple relationships. Let's start at the beginning.

1:38.9

Okay, so I was actually born into betrayal trauma. I didn't know what that was until very recently,

1:48.0

but my biological father cheated on my mother when she was pregnant with me. So literally all of

1:55.9

that stuff that was in her body, all of those hormones and feelings and emotions when she was pregnant with me

2:01.8

were going into me too. So when I was born, she sunk into deep postnatal depression

2:07.7

and then an obviously betrayal trauma. And she wasn't able to care for me fully. So I was left,

2:14.7

not through any fault of her own, but neglected really as a baby because she

2:19.2

wasn't able to cope with what she was going through emotionally. Then when I was around seven,

2:24.7

she met my stepdad who I didn't trust. I just even as a child, I just had this sense that

...

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