Really, we need to kind of accept there are so many things that we don't have control of,

rather than thinking that we are in control of everything within our lives

and that we can perfect them and optimize them and fulfill them. You're listening to doing it right with me Pandora Sykes, a podcast where I talk to experts about the myths, anxieties, trivialities and trends of modern life.

There's no such thing as the right life.

But what might we be getting wrong?

In this series, I'll be exploring outrage culture,

arrival fallacy, and the perils of instant gratification,

and lobbing some pretty big questions at my guests,

like, why do human beings find change so hard? What would

a more inclusive society look like? And what is the difference between optimism and hope? This is a

podcast that looks at the little things and the big things and asks, what can we do to live life

better? Not just for ourselves, but for everyone.

Julia Samuel is a psychotherapist, grief counsellor and the founding patron of Child

Bereavement UK. She is also the author of the acclaimed Griefworks and a new book, This

Too Shall Pass, stories of change, crisis and hopeful beginnings,

all about why resisting change only makes it harder to deal with. When life sucks, we say

this too shall pass, and hopefully it does, she writes. But here's the hitch. When life is good, it too inevitably will pass.

There is an overload of information that we can get from every kind of different platform and source

rather than sitting down and just reading a book, which was all I had. So

when I had a baby, there were about three books that we read and they gave you a bit of

psychological insight about attachment and Donald Winnicott, the Good Enough Mother. And those were

the kind of roadmaps that I took. I didn't go into libraries.

...