Welcome to UnFuck Your Brain. The only podcast that teaches you how to use psychology, feminism, and coaching to rewire your brain

and get what you want in life.

And now here's your host, Harvard Law School grad, Feminist Rockstar, and Master Coach, Kara Lowenthal. Hello my chickens I am coming to you at least writing these notes really from Martha's

Vineyard so I'm actually as I'm talking recording, I just got back from Martha's Vineyard.

And it's beautiful there.

If you've been there, you know that.

There's a lot of really beautiful nature, and they pay a lot of attention to kind of preserving the local

ecosystem there and preserving the experience of the island. And it has me thinking

about something that I talked about briefly in another

podcast I sort of mentioned it in my intro to a separate topic but a lot of y'all

really loved it I got a lot of feedback about it and requests for more kind of exploration of the topic

and I agree that it really deserves a full episode because it has been a life-changing concept

for me. And that is what I call the concept of the human ecosystem. So I developed

this concept in my last long-term relationship towards the beginning when I was

doing a lot of thought work on learning to accept my partner the way that he was. I found thought work around the time we got together. This was years ago. And that was a challenge for me because the way I grew up, there was no such

thing as not having an opinion about someone else's behavior. I come from a

Jewish family. That was literally a foreign concept to me,

that you could just not have opinions

about other people's behavior.

And I don't think that I'm alone in that,

and you know, Jews are not a huge proportion of the population. I don't think we're alone in it either right a lot of us have quite a lot of opinions about other people's behavior

especially if they're close to us the closer closer they get to us, the more opinions we have.

...