meta_pixel
Tapesearch Logo
CALL CHELSEA PERETTI

BEING NICE, RADISHES, BEAR ATTACKS

CALL CHELSEA PERETTI

Chelsea Peretti

Comedy, Society & Culture, Arts

4.71.5K Ratings

🗓️ 29 October 2012

⏱️ 76 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

In this episode Chelsea tries to be nicer to callers. A new song is premiered! A chef calls, Nick Kroll calls, Retta calls, a guy calls Chelsea a bitch, more abuse is confirmed, and Chelsea tests listeners on their food taste. Also: vomit, love.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

It's crazy when I try to express to you that I think that I OD'd on coffee yesterday.

0:08.5

I really, really feel that I had coffee poisoning,anking through my sis. I'm in a weird place in life.

0:16.5

I have to say my health is back to normal. Thank you so much for all the flowers that everyone

0:21.1

sent, JK as well as the cards JK. I receive no well wishes whatsoever.

0:29.1

But my health feels pretty good, but I've gotten to a really weird teenagery dark place in which I'm going to bed at five in the morning.

0:39.0

And just wired, waking up, wired, having coffee feeling even more wired.

0:44.0

It's out of control.

0:46.0

So today I can't in good conscience say I have coffee cranking through my sis,

0:51.0

because I felt like I took four sips and I was already ODing today.

0:55.4

Something's happening. Something's in the air. The end is nigh. But you know what it's like

1:01.0

when you're like on that kind of a schedule?

1:03.2

Some of you maybe you work a night shift or you're a creative type and you might relate.

1:08.6

You're still kind of asleep.

1:19.2

And you're not fully up but someone calls and they have that aggressive energy of like come on this is what the world is doing. We're all up. What are you doing?

1:24.0

Reminds me of a new song that I have to premiere today on the P-cast.

1:29.0

When a square is really getting on your back, just saying, fall in line, they're calling you,

1:39.8

they've got that peppy aggression in their voice in the morning.

1:43.4

They're like, come on, I'm a square, be a square, be a square,

1:46.0

I'm up, why aren't you up?

1:48.7

So this song goes out to you. I'm not fully

1:53.0

I'm not fully awake yet I'm not fully awake

2:07.0

Please call me back or text me because I am not fully awake.

...

Transcript will be available on the free plan in -4536 days. Upgrade to see the full transcript now.

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Chelsea Peretti, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Chelsea Peretti and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.

Copyright © Tapesearch 2025.