Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm bailiff Jesse Thorne. This week, Kviot Emptor.

Scarlett loves guinea pigs. They have a long history of guinea pig ownership, starting in childhood.

Scarlett desperately wants a guinea pig in their life again, but Morgan is opposed.

Morgan says that the couple's two

dogs are more than enough pets for one home. Adding a guinea pig is too much work. Who's right,

who's wrong, only one can decide. Please rise as Judge John Hodgman enters the courtroom

and presents an obscure cultural reference.

Otra question serious, senor. Have you seen a type of peropetion? enters the courtroom and presents an obscure cultural reference. Another question, Siria, seigneur.

I've seen a type of perro-pecheon who's called Guinea Pig.

And has a ruido as,

Wee, Wee, Wee, We!

We!

Yes, it's a perro-peakeneo-peakeneo-Pig.

And it's a

Guinea pig.

Aenea pig.

Beileth Jesse Thorne, please swear the litigants in.

Morgan, Scarlett, please rise and raise your right hands.

Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth,

and nothing but the truth, so help truth, and nothing but the truth?

So help you, God, or whatever? I do. Yep. Do you swear to abide by Judge John Hodgman's ruling,

despite the fact that my little joke I was going to make just now was about the thing that he did as obscure cultural reverence about it? Of course, we were going to get to the same place. Yeah. I do. Yes.

...