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Listen, Learn & Love Hosted by Richard Ostler

Episode 779: Tonya Baker Miller, LCSW, Active LDS, Supporting Transgender Members and Their Families

Listen, Learn & Love Hosted by Richard Ostler

Richard Ostler

Religion & Spirituality

4.8839 Ratings

🗓️ 21 September 2024

⏱️ 100 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

This episode is dedicated to the loving memory of JeNeal Nichol Miller, who passed away on Pioneer Day this year. She inspired everyone she knew to be nonjudgmental and Christlike. She was a true ally and is deeply missed. **This episode talks about suicide. If you are suicidal, please call/text/chat 988** My friend Tonya Baker Miller (married mother of four, active LDS, Founder/Clinical Director of Cottonwood Counseling and Coaching) joins us to talk about supporting transgender/non-binary Latter-day Saints. Tonya has more than ten years of experience as a therapist working with transgender individuals, and also has transgender friends and family members about whom she cares deeply. Tonya talks about gospel principles, provides clinical perspectives, and offers ideas to help us better understand and support our transgender friends. Tonya addresses questions such as: “Is this a phase?”, “Is being transgender a disorder?”, “Is there a ‘cause,’ or do some people just ‘come with this?’”, and “What is intersectionality? And why are there so many transgender people also on the autism spectrum?” Tonya also talks about how complex transgenderism is. For example, the medical/clinical angle tends to utilize the disease model to characterize many challenges that transgender individuals encounter. Socially, there is so much judgment (political, religious, etc.) around transgenderism that we risk getting lost in abstraction and losing focus on ways we can show love and help each individual meet their day-to-day needs. She describes ways that we can support our transgender friends as they navigate this incredibly nuanced and misunderstood space. I am so grateful for Tonya and her work to support transgender Latter-day Saints and their families. I learn so much from her and grateful to have her on the podcast. I hope that you listen to this episode and gain more understanding/vocabulary/tools to better love/support our transgender/non-binary friends. On a personal note, I am grateful for Tonya for being a guest host of this podcast and writing a chapter in my third book about healing from Church-generated trauma (see show notes). You are awesome Tonya! Links: JeNeal Miller’s Obituary: www.legacy.com/us/obituaries/name/jeneal-miller-obituary?id=55698595 Tonya’s clinical practice: www.cottonwood.care Tonya’s Chapter from my third book, Building The Good Ship Zion (Chapter 3: Ministering to Those With Church-Generated Trauma): www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/9fvz6iy4k75nwp5tpupi9/Chapter-3-Ministering-to-Those-with-Church-Generated-Pain-or-Trauma.pdf?rlkey=zahycun2wv27opaq7l7s5y8qf&dl=0 Tonya’s earlier episode on this podcast (# 501) on healing from Church-generated trauma: soundcloud.com/user-818501778/episode-501-tonya-baker-miller-healing-from-church-trauma-strong-lds-families “Tonya’s Story,” (about supporting her son, Andy, during the time he was coming out as gay), from Gospel Library: JeNeal Miller’s Obituary: www.legacy.com/us/obituaries/name/jeneal-miller-obituary?id=55698595 Tonya’s clinical practice: www.cottonwood.care Tonya’s Chapter from my third book, Building The Good Ship Zion (Chapter 3: Ministering to Those With Church-Generated Trauma): www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/9fvz6iy4k75nwp5tpupi9/Chapter-3-Ministering-to-Those-with-Church-Generated-Pain-or-Trauma.pdf?rlkey=zahycun2wv27opaq7l7s5y8qf&dl=0 Tonya’s earlier episode on this podcast (# 501) on healing from Church-generated trauma: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/episode-501-tonya-baker-miller-healing-from-church/id1347971725?i=1000550041715 “Tonya’s Story,” (about supporting her son, Andy, during the time he was coming out as gay), from Gospel Library: https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/topics/gay/videos/tonyas-story Instagram: @tbird1490 Facebook: facebook.com/profile.php?id=100011381891072

Transcript

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0:00.0

Welcome listeners to another episode of Listen, Learn, and Love, hosted by Richard Osler.

0:09.0

My guest on today's podcast is my friend and therapist, Tanya Miller.

0:14.0

Welcome to the podcast.

0:15.0

Hi, Richard, thank you.

0:17.0

Tanya is in our home on a Sunday afternoon, and we're going to talk about supporting trans members and their families.

0:23.4

And Tanya is one of the most qualified persons I know in the Latter-day St. Community to talk about this.

0:31.5

Just a little background on Tanya.

0:33.3

She's a licensed clinical social worker.

0:35.3

She got her undergraduate from BYU, then got her master's in social work from the University of Utah.

0:42.2

She's been in the mental health care for about 20 years.

0:46.2

She has been working with transgender Latter-day Saints and their families for about 10 years, which is a long time in this space.

0:54.6

She's the founder and clinical director of Cottonwood Council and Coaches.

0:59.6

If I said that right?

1:01.2

Close enough, yes.

1:02.5

Cottonwood counseling and coaching.

1:04.0

Counseling and coaching.

1:05.4

There you go.

1:05.9

I can read my notes right.

1:06.8

Close enough.

1:07.3

You're great.

1:08.2

And their website is Cottonwood.

1:10.5

We'll put that in the show notes.

...

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