To be human is to be gross and weird. To be human is to be disgusting and bizarre. To be human is to

poop and pee and pick your boogers and talk to yourself in the mirror and it your armpit and then

sniff your finger. To be human is to be ultimately gross and weird. And that's normal. We're all gross and

weird. However, most other people don't see us being gross and weird. On occasion, our family member,

best friend, or significant other might catch us being gross and weird. And depending on

our closeness to that person, it might not be so bad. But for the most part, other people don't see us

being gross or weird. Some of our grossest and weirdest moments usually happen alone.

And there's something kind of stressful about that.

I know I personally find myself feeling like, oh my God, I'm a freak and no one knows. I feel like

an imposter. I'm putting off this facade to the world that I'm cool. I'm cute, I'm clean. Actually, nobody thinks

I'm clean and nobody has since I was a teenager. When I one time said on the internet that I don't

like to shower, that has stuck with me. And people have thought of me as unhygienic for the

remainder of my career. So maybe my feelings are irrational because

people actually do think that I'm gross and weird. So that's kind of nice. But people don't know

how gross and weird I am. People don't know how gross and weird you are. We are the only ones who

are with ourselves 24 hours a day, seven days a week,

to see every single side of ourselves. Our most disgusting and bizarre of moments come out when we're

alone. Recently, in my moments alone, I've been finding myself doing shit that I cannot imagine other people

seeing. Like truly, it makes me shudder to think about others seeing into my home, seeing into my

car, seeing into my mind in my moments alone, because some of the shit I do is just fucking weird or gross or bizarre.

Like it's it's kind of mortifying.

However, ironically, today I'm going to be sharing with you all of the gross and weird shit

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