How to Talk to Our Kids (and Ourselves!) About Sex

Conversations with Dr. Jennifer

Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife

Self-improvement, Education, Mental Health, Sexuality, Health & Fitness

4.4 • 978 Ratings

🗓️ 28 January 2025

⏱️ 35 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Despite their reactions to our attempts to discuss it, our children are looking to us to help them make sense of their sexuality. And while the prospect of talking to kids about sex can feel daunting, these conversations—no matter how imperfect—make it clear to our children that we care about them, are invested in their wellbeing, and can handle discussing difficult topics with them. During this 2024 Restore presentation, Dr. Finlayson-Fife shares valuable insights on how parents can foster an ongoing, healthy, and honest dialogue with their children about sex and how doing so will empower them to make informed, confident, and integrity-driven choices around sexuality. For a deeper exploration on these topics, enroll in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's recently updated How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex course! **Through 1/31/25 you can SAVE $200 on The Art of Desire Retreat w/code EARLYBIRD**

Transcript

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0:00.0	A lot of people that I work with grew up learning that desire and pleasure were scary,
0:06.0	that they were the feelings that were interfering with their goodness, that there was something going wrong.
0:13.0	And a lot of us treat our kids like something's going wrong, rather than this is normal to human sexual development
0:21.6	and something would be going wrong if they weren't having any of those feelings, right?
0:25.6	That this is a part of them growing into the capacity to be adults,
0:30.6	to be in an adult intimate relationship,
0:33.6	and that they're not only essential to reproduction,
0:41.1	those feelings are essential to relational joy.
0:50.6	Welcome to Conversations with Dr. Jennifer,
0:53.9	a collection of interviews on the topics of relationships, sexuality, spirituality,
0:55.9	and more, all featuring Dr. Finlayson Fife.
1:03.8	Hi, everyone. Welcome. I have been asked to talk to you about how to talk to our kids, and by extension, how to talk to ourselves about sex.
1:17.6	This is not an easy topic, right?
1:19.4	We feel like we should do this, but it is very hard to do this.
1:24.1	And it's in part because parents, kids, and sex do not mix for a good reason. Biologically,
1:30.3	it's protective that our kids don't want to know about our sexuality and we don't really
1:37.3	want to infect them with this reality. And so it's very, very easy to want to avoid this responsibility to our kids.
1:46.5	But we live in a time when this really isn't an option.
1:50.7	We live in a very sexualized culture.
1:53.3	There are messages about what constitutes healthy or good sexuality
1:58.4	that kids are getting from multiple sources
2:01.6	and they really, really need our perspective,
	...

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