S6, Ep 8 Best Friend Therapy: Rejection - Why does it hurt so much? How can we overcome it? What is self-rejection?
Friendship Therapy
Emma Reed Turrell
4.8 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 27 November 2023
⏱️ 50 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Welcome to this week's episode of Best Friend Therapy - the fourth instalment of our miniseries on break-ups and the final episode of Season 6!
As we have been exploring different break-ups, whether it be a romantic relationship, the ending of a friendship, family estrangement or career change, we realised there is one feeling that connects them all - the feeling of rejection. So we are dedicating this final episode to unpacking this feeling - to better understand why it hurts and what we can do to help ourselves.
It may be the season finale but it's most definitely not a rejection, merely a time for reflection, and we look to the work of Alain de Botton to teach us about constructive pessimism and remind ourselves of Eckhart Tolle's wise words in "The Power of Now." We also look to the great philosopher, Elizabeth Day, and hear what the glockenspiel had to teach her about rejection and why she took up the trumpet instead.
Emma introduces the Transactional Anaylysis theory of the "hot potato" and walks Elizabeth down her Staircase of Beliefs, to find the fear behind the rejection, and explains why the antidote to rejection is self-acceptance and a Joy List.
See you very soon for Season 7 and thanks, as always, for listening xx
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Alain de Botton talks about "constructive pessimism": https://youtu.be/Aw1oLtuJOXQ?si=6BswjGNwxPWlxc6G
Eckhart Tolle, "The Power of Now": https://amzn.eu/d/g0Oh6mo
On the Hot Potato Theory and Episcript, p.124: https://www.fanita-english.com/wp-content/uploads/pdf/Berne,%20phobia,%20episcripts%20and%20racketeering.pdf
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Best Friend Therapy is hosted by Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp.
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell
Best Friend Therapy @best.friend.therapy
Email: [email protected]
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | This is a passenger announcement. You can now book your train on Uber. |
| 0:07.0 | I get 10% back in credits to spend on Uber Eats, |
| 0:11.0 | so you can order your own fries instead of eating everyone else's. |
| 0:16.0 | Trains, now on Uber. |
| 0:18.0 | Teasing C's apply. Check the Uber app. |
| 0:21.0 | Hello and welcome to Best Friend Therapy. |
| 0:24.0 | I'm Elizabeth Day, author and podcaster. |
| 0:27.0 | For over 20 years, I've been best friends with a therapist. |
| 0:31.0 | That's me. Hello, I'm Emma Reed-Tarell and I'm a psychotherapist. |
| 0:35.0 | In my private practice, I talk to clients about the challenges they face in daily life, |
| 0:39.0 | and we work together in a non-judgmental, supportive space to increase their sense of well-being. |
| 0:43.0 | And as her BFF, I get all the benefit of her expertise and wisdom for free. |
| 0:48.0 | Emma makes me feel better about life, |
| 0:51.0 | but also helps me to understand why I act the way I do. |
| 0:55.0 | Thanks Liz. She's also one of the only people allowed to call me Liz. |
| 0:59.0 | We wanted to open the doors to our friendship and throw a light on the therapy |
| 1:03.0 | we all need in our everyday lives. |
| 1:05.0 | Each week, we chat about what's on our minds to get deeper in our minds. |
| 1:10.0 | Two best friends, one therapist, no filter. |
| 1:13.0 | That's Best Friend Therapy. |
| 1:18.0 | Welcome back to Best Friend Therapy and this is our season finale. |
| 1:22.0 | I'm crying. I'm feeling rejected already. |
... |
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